July 26, 2020 - Msg 114976: Asa... Your comment made me laugh & thought of these guys, I saw them once at a Bluegrass Festival..
https://youtu.be/BCISoTiYu_o * BTW They were good too!

G-F
July 26, 2020 - Msg 114977: I used my blower and blew the porch clean...
July 26, 2020 - Msg 114978:

HI Possum, you sneaked in there before me. I am so happy that the service for your aunt went so well. I thought, not only of Rev, but also of that Neal Diamond song that starts out with "Ahh, August night..." May the peace of Jesus fill you now this day.
MDC :)

July 26, 2020 - Msg 114979:

GF, so did you, good sweep, thanks! mdc

July 26, 2020 - Msg 114980: Hello to all..thank you for your kind words and prayers. Today is a better day. I had trouble sleeping last night and felt depressed like I didn't want to get out of bed this morning so I forced myself out, got dressed, and started doing chores. After a bit I was feeling much better. I just need to learn to let things go and not dwell on the pain around me. I went to my sister's house this evening and took a swim in the pool, which was really nice. JM, I actually did the popsicle thing a couple of months ago..just sat in a lawn chair under the trees and ate a popsicle and it was great. Right now it is so hot and humid and the mosquitos are terrible so its not so pleasant, though. We got quite a bit of rain with this little hurricane yesterday so the mosquitos will be worse in the coming days.

Good to see you Asa. You and your family continue to be in my prayers.

Love to all,
Boo
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114981:

JM--a POPSYCLE! Now why didn't I think of that? It's almost as good as chicken wire! haha :)
MDC
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114982: Good morning, folks!

Boo, MDC - That popsicle is therapetic. I'm tellin ya'! When you can mentally put yourself in a place of calm and innocence like something as simple as eating a popsicle in a lawn chair, it, for that moment, makes you feel like nothing's wrong. Maybe that's just me.

Well, those storms and rain are hovering up around Kansas City and are heading this way. Dont think we'll get anything severe. probably rolling thunder and some good rain! Our lawn guy doesnt even need to show up today. Our grass didnt grow at all. What did grow I could take a weedwhacker to in about 2 minutes.

I would like to announce I am six days free from the news! I have no clue what's happened or happening. My wife said if anything really big breaks, she'll let me know. Otherwise...I have been a lot less stressed out. I do keep up with our local COVID count. But other than that....zero knowledge.

Those chores arent going to get done by themselves! Unless you all want to come over and.....nah, never mind....you have your own things to do. ;) Take care and stay well. Think a good thought and do something that will make you smile!

John Masters
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114983: Hey again.

I wanted to post a link to someone I watch on Youtube. His name is Jordan and he does vlogging. if you dont know what vlogging is, it's filmed adventures and places of interest on Youtube. Kinda like mini documentaries. Anyway, he is in his 30's and he does his homework to really bring real knowledge to what's he's covering. He covers historic things, music, sports, places, museums, and from ALL eras too. Today, he just posted about country music legend, Stringbean. Two days ago, he stayed at Hank Snow's Rainbow Ranch! I really think you guys will enjoy watching him and what he covers. He does things about old, OLD Hollywood, the wild west, on and on.
Here's the link:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMC9R6OigawtoVTG_qHFMoQ

I hope you all find something and enjoy it!

John Masters
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114984: Thanks for the link, JM. I will check it out. Im with you on the news thing. I don't watch, either. I get enough sad drama right here with friends and family. lol.

Boo
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114985: John Masters, good ole Stringbean. I used to watch him perform on the old Hee Haw television program. In the following video, he is the tall skinny banjo player on the far left who introduces the song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mqLt0udYi4

from Poor Horatio
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114986: Hey, folks! We got rain! It still is too! I was about to go pour milk on my lawn and eat it with a spoon it was so crunchy! Rain, rain!

PH - Google search Stringbean. Good stuff from the old Grand Ol' Opry TV show that Ernest Tubb hosted! I barely remember seeing String on Hee Haww too.

John Masters
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114987: John Masters, how about Stringbean appearing on the Porter Wagoner Show?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bROzrYQhPE4

from Poor Horatio
July 27, 2020 - Msg 114988:

WE DEFY THE MAFIA! (:
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114989:

HI Everyone, remember when Tom used to grace us with
his poetry?
Well, Pappabear sent a cute one to me recently,
so I will share it here:

Dear Lord--
I'm proud to say, so far today,
I've got along all right;
I have not gossiped, bragged, or lied,
Or had a single fight.

I haven't lost my temper,
Or been grumpy, cold or vain;
I've not been bad in anyway,
Or caused anyone any pain.

But Lord, I need your help right now,
and through the hours ahead;
So please be with me, my dear Lord,
because I'm GETTING OUT OF BED! :)

I hope you are all doing ok. JM--glad you got some rain! ASA, please check the archives, as I have a you a question in my last post. thanks.
Hey, do you think we scared off Jason? I hope not. Also looking for
FRANKIE, BIG MAUDE, SPOT, and others.
Prayers for all,
MDC

July 28, 2020 - Msg 114990: Good morning, porch! We've got a soft, gentle rain falling this morning. The kind you really like to see, because it doesn't run off. It has time to soak in. I love it when it rains like that! Even the critters seem to enjoy it. The squirrels are out there rolling around in the wet grass, and birds are hopping around, apparently waiting to ambush the insects or worms that will surface in a rain such as this. I didn't realize we were going to get rain, so my sprinklers ran, starting at 6 a.m., and will try to run again this evening at 6 p.m., unless I remember to turn them off when it begins. I don't want to actually turn them off at the control box, because then I'll forget to turn them back on! Instead, I just hit "Stop" on my little remote and it cancels that particular run.

Yesterday I had a nice long post all written up, and somehow I hit that mysterious key - I never have figured out which one it is - that wipes out everything. No, it's not the reset button, I would have to hit that with the cursor, it's something on the lower left portion of the keyboard, but I don't know what it is. Grrr. I just shut the whole thing down and went and watched TV!

Anyway, I think I was thanking all of you for the sweet birthday wishes. It was a great birthday, and I'm planning to do it again next year! Also, I was responding to the needs and updates presented by many of you. You are all in my prayers, as always.

Hmmm. The wind is kicking up out there, looks like we might get a bit of a storm out of this yet. Drat, I was loving that gentle rain. Oh well. Rain is rain, and we need it.

MDC, I love your poem. Actually, it made the rounds at my church a few years ago, but it's fun to see it again. I think I'll just share it with my email list. Some will remember it, some won't, but all will enjoy it, as I did. There's actually a lot of truth in it. Thanks!

Oh, dear. I do miss TOM, and I'm sure everyone else does as well. He was a gentle little soul, who had overcome some difficult and often cruel challenges in his life. He had a touch of Eeyore in him, but then, don't we all? Those of us who have had a strong and healthy body to live in up until now, probably have no idea what is was like for him, to live in his broken and twisted little body. It gives me a warm feeling, to think of him now, at home with the Lord, in a heavenly body that gives him no pain and can stand straight and tall before God. I miss him, but wouldn't wish him back here like he was, for anything, and I'm just pretty sure he wouldn't return if he could!

Well, Trinket is in here looking for a lap. I guess I'll accommodate her, and watch a little TV. Maybe I'll start a load of laundry first, before we settle down. She's such a sweet little thing. She curls up in my lap, or alongside me, lying partly on me and partly on the arm of my recliner, and falls asleep. Her head is toward the back of the chair, and now and then she will rouse up, twist her little self around so her head is on my chest, and she just gazes up at me with big liquid eyes, and I can just feel the love. Then a little later, she'll be on the floor, being rowdy, and making a total pestilence of herself. Gotta love her!

Blessings, friends. Stay home if you can, stay safe and healthy. I read where President Trump says they are getting very close to a vaccine. Apparently they have doubled down on the process of developing it, and have "shaved years off the process", as he put it. I hope he's right. --Romeena
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114991: I admit I have some misgivings about the vaccine, Romeena, especially one that's being rushed AND is being funded by some well known globalists/population control advocates. Also when there is a treatment that has been proven to work.

Speaking of Eeyore, I would like to ask the porch for your prayers. My wife has been talking divorce(again) over difference of opinions, which seems to usually be the case. She says our values are too different now versus when we met, which I can't understand, as I am pretty much a "what you see is what you get" type of guy and was honest about things when we met. Even things that didn't make me look good. She says I never want to talk to her, but I do. Admittedly, over the years I have tried to stay away from "deep discussions" because I never known what will send her into an angry fit.
I have also realized over the years and from research that I am living in a pretty toxic environment, so I wouldn't entirely be against divorce except for what it would mean for the kids and my custody of them, whom I have done most of the raising and caring for. Also for where I would go, as my library job is part time and that worked out well raising the kids, especially with schools closed, but it doesn't work if I need a place to go.
After our last disagreement a couple of weeks ago, I thought things were going halfway decent because things seemed back to "normal", but then last night out of the blue she brings it up again, and this after I have been supportive of and helping her with her recent projects.
I am sorry for unloading here. This is mentally, physically, emotionally, and even spiritually exhausting living with a toxic person whom you have to walk on eggshells around.

Not to be too much of a downer, and I may have mentioned this before, but during my nightly watching of TAGS as I drift off to sleep, I always wonder about Andy during the show's opening theme, where he seems to be whistling while he and Opie walk to the fishing hole. And I wonder if he meant to do that to seem like he is whistling the show's theme song.

Have a peaceful day, everyone.

-Sterling Holobyte
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114992: Evenin' folks,

Guess I'm a little late to the party! usually here a lot earlier than this. But the day was calling early. Dog gone it!

Sterling - Man...sorry to hear of your marriage like that. I've been thru a marriage that I wish I hadnt. My marriage now is number 2. My first one was to someone who turned on me on a dime. To this day, I never knew why she did it, but Boom! Mine wasn't an "eggshell" situation, but I know how it feels to have your spouse go back and forth.

About TOM, can I ask what was wrong with him? He seemed...how do I put this...mentally challenged? Is that accurate? I really am not trying to be cruel.

Romeena - Our forecast has just blown up. We are supposed to, stress SUPPOSED, to get rain ALL week. Our percentages for both day and night are 60%, 80%, 80%, 70%, 60%, 50%. Dont think there's a threat of any damaging storms, but I hope it fills some of these creeks back up. Right now, our area has some really long puddles. LOL!

PH - Havent hit the Stringbean on Wagoner's show yet. But I will. I will.

Ok, time to go feed the dogs and myself. Hey to SPOT, Sarah, Asa, MDC, Frankie, Maude, papabear, Boo and everyone else Barney locked up while Andy was gone those eight measley, little ol' hours.
Have a great night. Stay well and do something fun!

John Masters
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114993: Good evening, porch. Sterling, it's good to see you after a bit of an absence. Sorry to hear that things are about like always with your wife. In a way, I feel a little sorry for her, because it appears that she's a very discontented and unhappy person. As I recall, there is a problem with faith. You have it, she doesn't. That could explain a lot. For the most part, Christians are the happiest people I know. Most people who have a strong faith in God are generally happy and upbeat, and tend to see their glass half full. You will be in my prayers.

John Masters, you asked about Tom. To answer your question, and I can understand why you asked - I would hesitate to call him mentally challenged. I think socially challenged would be more accurate, and I think others who knew him for a long time would agree. I spoke with him on the phone several times, and he seemed actually quite sharp, and was surprisingly well-spoken. His speech didn't match his writing. Our friend Don Hutson, who lived near him, and was a tremendous help in the the projects we took on to help Tom, had met him personally, of course, and his assessment was much the same. Intelligent, just uneducated and unsocialized. Tom had a difficult physical deformity - a terribly advanced form of scoliosis, that left him with a small and compact torso atop not-quite-normal legs, resulting in him being quite short, with a prominent hump on his back and some twisting and rotation in his upper body. His arms were quite thin and stick-like. With all that put together - the physical problems, his obvious lack of writing skills, his almost child-like response to some things, his dependence on his mother and his deep distress when she passed - all that made me think that he probably had very little formal schooling, maybe third grade or so. I would imagine that his mother just kept him out of school to avoid bullying, and probably pretty much kept him at home as well. I don't know that for a fact, it just seems logical to me, and answers a lot of questions. Some will remember that he used to post some poetry - some quite simple, and many very lovely. It didn't match the way he wrote his comments, and he never said he did or didn't write them, but I'm pretty sure he knew how to cut and paste - hence, the poetry. One thing I know for sure, amid all this conjecture, he did know the Lord, and had a strong faith. I'm sure we have his mother to thank for that. I'm really looking forward to meeting him one day, along with a lot of other variously handicapped folks I've known or been related to, over the years. Everyone will be whole and strong, and oh my, the conversations we'll have! Well, you asked, and I have told you all that I know, and some that I have just put together out of what I observed. None of it would hold up in court, as Andy says.

Blessings, friends. --Romeena
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114994: Romeena and so many others, you are a bird in this world! Prayers for all. Prayers appreciated here as well. Ro, my email for your stories is a Google one. My 'handle' plus 061979.ap. If I don't get anything soon, I'll try to be less cryptic! Looking forward to your stories.
Ang
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114995: BTW, if any of my Andy Griffith fan family wants to email me, jump right in! Hold on and let that finger lose.
July 28, 2020 - Msg 114996: Loose!
July 29, 2020 - Msg 114997:

Sterling - are you two (or even one of you, hint, hint) seeing a counselor? I'm assuming yes, but if not, I do suggest it. We also have the Great Counselor, the Holy Spirit! Don't be afraid to ask Him for support. The Word says that the same Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead is dwelling in us! That's one powerful helper. :) It sounds like your wife is bi-polar. Is that so? May help to find out. My prayers are with you and the kids. Are they grown now? I forget, sorry.
ANG, I think I figured out your cryptic email address and will try it soon.
Well Folks, I'm done with MLB already. So disappointed what they are doing. Dr Fauchi throws out the 'first pitch' and then goes up into the stands, and maskless, sits right next to two other people, thus no mask and no distancing. :( Also, after seeing the blm painted on the back of the mound, that did me in.
But please understand, it is the blm 'corporation,' if you will, that is highly questionable, not the everyday person who supports the concept. OK, off my box.
Hey, our prisoner of love, Susan Oliver, was on Gomer Pyle USMC tonight. She had a much better role than that nior one on tags.
I went to a local mall today for the first time in months! Here in the Phx area, groups of seniors will 'fast walk' the concourse. It was fun, and in nice cool AC. I also even shopped and bought some new
handkerchiefs.
I continue to pray for all the porch every morning. :) God bless,
MDC




July 29, 2020 - Msg 114998: Good morning all.

Romeena, I miss our dear Tom and his uplifting poems. I think you expressed that so beautifully when thinking of him with our Heavenly Father with a heavenly body.

MDC, I'm guessing it was somebody else talking about that actress. I don't even know who she is. I mentioned a while back about an actress named Phylis Thaxter who I see on a lot of old Alfred Hitchc@ck shows. Speaking of such, I saw one yesterday that had Goober, Jim Lindsey, and Olive in it. And another one that had Sharon Despain and Emmett Clark in it.
MDC, You mentioned about missing the treadmill at the gym. Years ago the company I worked for decided to put in a workout area for the employee's. Well lucky me got to be the one who set it all up. (I probably worked harder in there setting stuff up than anyone did exercising) The company bought this very nice treadmill. Huge deck, biggest I have ever seen. Long and wide. And could go up to 15 MPH and up to a 12 degree uphill grade. Problem was it actually took 220 volts to operate, so I had to run a seperate circuit to it. No small feat based on how far I had to go to the nearest panel. Anyway, I used that machine a lot over the years and really enjoyed it because the deck was so large. Years later, I was asked one day by the division manager if I could remove a door going into the workout room. I asked what for and he said they were getting a new treadmill delivered and the company delivering needed the door off to fit it in. So I did and the next day the company showed up with the new treadmill. I asked them what they were going to do with the old one and the guy said just scrap it out. I was stunned, so I asked him if I could have it, and he said sure, saves me the hassle of taking it back to the shop. So it sits in my garage at home, and I use it all the time. I had to run a 220 volt line in the garage for it. I actually wanted to set it up in my basement but it is just to blame heavy to get down there. Sure happy I managed to capture it.

Hey to Ang. Good to see you.

And hey to Sterling. Sorry to read you are still having some marital problems. You guys are in my prayers.

Well I best get out there and get mowing before the day gets to hot. Supposed to be triple digit for the next week here. Dry heat or not, that's still dang hot!

Thank you all again for your prayers for my family.

Asa
July 29, 2020 - Msg 114999: Good morning, Porch

Good news from our little county. Our COVID numbers are starting to bottom out. We went from about 86 active cases to 70 to 60 in three days! And our quarantined folks went down from 285 to 208 in three days! I think we finally peaked. We were doing SO good thru this whole thing, having 2 cases, then 1, then 0, then 1, then 0. And all of a sudden...Boom! We were up into the hundreds in active cases. and quarantined was up to almost 350.

Let me say, right away, that I meant no disrespect when asking about TOM. I didnt want any of you looking at me any different after asking about him. It's really hard to know something from looking at just words on a screen. I knew from the way he structured his writing that something was different, so that's why I asked. Hope none of you think of me any different after asking if he was mentally challenged. Honestly, I didnt know how to word it.

MDC - This baseball season is a joke and I am completely ignoring it. I'm acting like the season was canceled and I'm not even looking at it. As far as BLM goes, I have sworn off MLB. And the NFL? Well, to blazes with them AND my Chiefs. I wont go into everything they are doing, but they have went WAY, WAY overboard and lost my support, my respect and being a fan! Now, I'll slide my box under the porch next to yours.

Asa - Good to see you again, buddy! My dad got one of them exercising machines that you make your legs and arms go back and forth like your skiing. Never used it. He got on it maybe twice and it sat and collected dust for about 25 years! LOL! He used to be one of those home shopping network enthusiasts. Continued prayers for you and yours!

Rain's comin'! Looks like it's coming up from Oklahoma and will be with us thru the day. We got a good dowsing the other day. Sure wet everything down. We have a long way to go before those creeks start rolling again though!

I hear lunch a callin'. Y'all have a great and safe day! Be happy and find something fun to do!

John Masters
July 29, 2020 - Msg 115000: Sterling Holobyte, it is sad to learn that your wife has asked for a divorce. Have you tried marriage counseling?
How many years have you two been married?

Near Toronto here in Canada, a homeowner decided to throw a party. Over 200 guests showed up. Currently, Ontario has a restriction of social gatherings of no more than 10 people. So when the neighbors complained about the noise the crowd was making, police were called. The homeowner is now facing a possible $100,000 fine. Ouch.

Romeena, when you posted how you are missing our late Tom, that made me also think about the late Rev and the late Millie. They are all missed.
Also, regarding President Trump's comment about expediting the development of a vaccine, that scares me. From what I know about vaccine development, it is a time consuming process e Sterling Holobyte, it is sad to learn that your wife has asked for a divorce. Have you tried marriage counseling?
How many years have you two been married?

Near Toronto here in Canada, a homeowner decided to throw a party. He invited over 200 guests. Currently, Ontario has a restriction to social gatherings of no more than 10 people. So when the neighbors complained about the noise the crowd was making, police were called. The homeowner is now facing a possible $100,000 fine. Ouch.

Romeena, when you posted how you are missing our late Tom, that made me also think about the late Rev and the late Millie. They are all missed.
Also, regarding President Trump's comment about expediting the development of a vaccine, that scares me. From what I know about vaccine development, it is a time consuming process e Sterling Holobyte, it is sad to learn that your wife has asked for a divorce. Have you tried marriage counseling?
How many years have you two been married?

Near Toronto here in Canada, a homeowner decided to throw a party. He invited over 200 guests. Currently, Ontario has a restriction to social gatherings of no more than 10 people. So when the neighbors complained about the noise the crowd was making, police were called. The homeowner is now facing a possible $100,000 fine. Ouch.

Romeena, when you posted how you are missing our late Tom, that made me also think about the late Rev and the late Millie. They are all missed.
Also, regarding President Trump's comment about expediting the development of a vaccine, that scares me. From what I know about vaccine development, it is a time consuming process even when it is done correctly and safely.

from Poor Horatio

from Poor Horatio

from Poor Horatio
July 29, 2020 - Msg 115001: See what happens when you cut and paste too many times and don't proofread before posting?

from Poor Horatio
July 29, 2020 - Msg 115002: JM, glad things are looking better in your area. I haven't looked at the news here but am hoping things are at least slowing down.

So sorry to hear about the problems you are going through Sterling. It is very difficult to live in that kind of toxicity. Your daughter is 20 now, isn't she? And Noah is still a minor, so I see your dilemma. No easy answers.

No news here, just wanted to check in and see how you all were.

Blessings,
Boo
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115003:

Poor Horatio, I think you are chewing your cabbage twice or three times! ha Very weird post indeed. Proofreading, yup, that's the key!
Some of you may have heard about the train derailment and bridge collapsing here in my town of Tempe. The FBI has been called in
as possible foul play may involved. Such strange times. Over last weekend a protesting crowd tangled with our town police. It was quite nasty for this college town, and then this happens today. Several people said that they heard an explosion before the bridge went down. Lord be with us.
I DID watch some tags tonight however to try and enjoy a few smiles, and thank God Barney will not be going to Greendale. :)
ASA--maybe I'll fly up to SLC and get a good workout on your treadmill! ha
Glad you have the smarts to run a 220 v line!
JM--I think we all are OK with your Tom inquiry. We all knew something was not quite
right. RO had a lot of communication with him, and got to see the situation pretty well.
Very hot 112 to 115 here the next few days.
Keep well my friends, keep extra lamp oil with you, and
keep the faith.
MDC :)
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115004: Remember MDC....It’s a DRY heat 🔥......haha...G-F
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115005: Good morning, Porch

Round after round after round of rain all thru yesterday and last night. I think we had five rounds. It'd start, rain a while / bit, then stop. Little later, another round where it'd rain for an hour or so. Stop. Last night is when it finally unloaded and rain for several hours. Then, during that, the power in the entire valley went out! Talk about pitch black! It was off for two and half hours. This morning, it's nice, cool, breezy and wonderful. Makes you wish you were at or on a body of water with a fishing pole or nestled in a lawn chair.

PH - Had a little trouble there repeating yourself. Now...where have a I seen someone repeating themselves? Huh? Huh? Huh? ;)

Boo - Good to see you check in. I keep thinking to myself, someday...we are going to have that one day where we all let go a huge exhale. Hang in there!

MDC - Glad to hear I did ok. I knew it would be touchy to ask about Tom. I sat here really pondering how to ask and what exactly to say.

Well, my friends...Dad is stirring, dogs need fed and the day is staring me right in the face. Y'all have a safe, happy and great day! Think good thoughts!

John Masters
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115006: Good morning, porch! PH, I know what you mean. Cutting and pasting can produce some strange results at times, but I declare, I think you won the prize! With all the writing I do, I naturally do a lot of cutting and pasting, and believe me, I've produced some doozies too. Sometimes even just one word that gets lost in the shuffle can really make a difference. I confess, sometimes I don't proofread here on the porch, and usually find myself wishing I had done so. I do proof anything I'm going to submit to Charlotte Tucker for the magazine, but even then, I can miss something. I'm a rapid reader, and when it's something I wrote myself, I tend to see what I expect to see, not what's actually there. The results can be funny, or confusing, or sometimes even disastrous.

I recall a funny story, and I think I'll share it here. Many years ago, my dad had hired a young woman, around 25 or so, as a secretary in his office. She wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he was trying to give her a chance. One day a woman showed up at the office, and "irate" would have been a very mild description. She was madder than a wet hen! She was waving a letter and screaming at my dad!

He took the letter and read it, and began apologizing to the lady, and trying to calm her. Then he went to the files and found a letter from the woman, complaining about a product. The new secretary, trying to function independently, had written a response and mailed it back to the woman, without involving my dad. That letter was what the furious woman had brought in.

The woman's original letter was not typed, it was written in cursive, and her writing was not very clear, to say the least. Her last name was Scharp. The secretary had misread it as "Icborp." It really did look like "Icborp", but anyone should have known that there would be no such name, or at least questioned it. Therefore, when she typed the response, it was addressed to "Mrs. Susan Icborp." As if that wasn't bad enough, in the body of the letter, she was trying to make it friendly and personal, so she had repeated that name, in phrases such as "So sorry you had that experience with our product, Mrs. Icborp." And so you see, Mrs. Icborp, etc."

My dad was about to explode, caught between two powerful emotions. On one hand, he was furious with the secretary for not showing him the letter before she mailed it. On the other hand, his sometimes-wicked sense of humor was causing him to have to choke back laughter at the whole situation. He took the lady into the warehouse, replaced her product and gave her a sample of a new product to try out, all the while offering apologies. She cooled down, even laughed a little herself, and all was forgiven. The secretary didn't fare quite so well. That big blooper was the last straw, and Daddy had to do what he had been trying to avoid. He set her free to find something a little better suited to her meager abilities. However, "Mrs. Icborp" became a legend in our family, and we all would employ it when someone did something dumb, including my dad himself.

Hey, that makes a pretty good story. Look out, Charlotte Tucker, it may show up on your desk!

Well, the young man is here, removing the old leaf guards from a portion of the gutters on my house, and replacing them with the ones that admit nothing but water. The old ones did keep leaves and large debris out, but the finer stuff, like the stringy little blossoms from the cottonwoods would make it through, and since the gutters on that side of the house drain into the catch basin where the sump pump lives, that debris would eventually fill the bottom of the basin and clog the pump. I would not be aware until the water building up in the back yard would be approaching the back door! It got scary at times. I've been through two ruined pumps, and am currently paying Ted to come by and clean that basin out. He put a "sock" over the inflow pipe in the basin, but it fills up quickly and I am not able to get the lid off the basin, remove and clean out the sock, and put it back on. A couple of years ago, I could and did, but it's not on my "can-do" list anymore. I can get down there, but getting back up can be a problem! So, I'm attacking the problem at the source. I surely hope it works.

Hang in there, everyone. Whatever our current problems, remember that "this, too, shall pass!" Keep the faith. --Romeena
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115007: I guess Icborp could have been a sweedish name. heehee

Boo
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115008: Icborp.

Sounds like something you release after eating onions.

LOL!

John Masters
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115009: Well, drat! In reading my post above, I found two errors, in spite of having proof read it three times! They're not terrible, but they're errors nevertheless. I left out a quote mark at the end of the fourth paragraph. Both of those phrases at the end should have been enclosed in complete quotes. Also, I left out a comma after "cottonwoods" in the next-to-last paragraph. That's a parenthetical phrase, and should have been set off by commas at the beginning and the end. There are probably more that I'm still not catching. If you find them, say so! Feel free! I'll promise you, my late son would have. He and I had a little running game going, trying to catch each other in grammatical or punctuation errors. He was very sharp at it, and we had fun proofreading each other, or catching it in speech when we were together. It was all in good fun! --Romeena
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115010: Ha! good ones, both of you! --Romeena
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115011: Good morning all.

Romeena, I really enjoyed your story and it got me to thinking. Maybe we can, in an attempt to lighten our moods in these trying times, share some stories of such a nature as Romeena's.
In fact I'll share one that stays true to my treadmill story. I would frequently go into what was called our "Fit Factory" room and get a good workout on that treadmill. The room was secluded and I would usually just wear running shorts with out a shirt. So one day I am running away on it and this very attractive female starnger came in to the room. She said Hi, and introduced herself as the new Fitness Consultant (Traci) that was on contract with our company. I introduced myself to her, asking her if she was okay if I continued my workout. She said no problem, she was just looking to see what kind of workout equipment we had. After a few minutes she said bye and left the room.
Well a couple of days later, while on the clock, I had gone over to that building to check out an a/c problem. As I was walking down the hall our Division Office Coordinator *Barbara) came out of her office and the new Fitness Consultant was with her. As we passed in the hall, Barbara stopped and introduced me to her. I said Hi, and that we had already met. Traci, looked at me funny for a second, and then I could see she remembered who I was. She blurted out, "oh yea, I remember you now. I just didn't recognize you with clothes on. The second she said it, she realized how it sounded (she wasn't trying to be funny), Barbara's eyes were as big as dinner plates. About 4 heads came sticking out of nearby offices. I felt bad for poor Traci because she was really a very proper woman and wasn't trying to be funny or naughty. Well she and I both tried explaining what had happened, but those turkeys in the office wouldn't let go of it. Amazingly their a/c went down a few days later and I had to wait on parts. lol How do you spell reveng(e) 10-4 GF?

Asa
July 30, 2020 - Msg 115012: Asa, that's a great story! Now tell the truth, did you really have to wait on parts? I wouldn't blame you if you were just getting that reveng(e), not nary a bit. --Romeena
July 31, 2020 - Msg 115013: I love the story idea but I think I have probably told you all of mine. Most of mine took place on the job.

Asa, how embarrassing (did I spell that right,Romeena? You can check my mistakes, if you like ;). I guess we have been in situations like that a time or two. I know I have when I was young. I can remember spending a lot of time with a red face in my early nursing career and I cant go into details here on the porch. Most of my stories are beyond PG, unfortunately.

Well, today I turn 58! How in the world did I get here so quickly?! I am going to try and have a great day by staying away from news sources and thinking positively. I took my time getting out of bed this morning, checked my email and found a nice amazon gift card from Bruce. He usually goes out and buys me jewelry, which is very sweet but I don't wear it much. I guess he finally caught on. lol Sean is supposed to pick me up on his lunch hour and take me for taco bell (drive through of course) and then we will all have dinner together this evening here at home. With the covid raging around here, I stay out of public places unless I have to go. I even order my groceries online.

Erin started her job at subway yesterday and did great..no anxiety at all, which is a huge step forward. She will be getting plenty of hours and has a very understanding young boss who seems to know how to deal with anxiety issues. Erin will also be working with two of her friends there, which helps a lot. Thank you again for your prayers for Erin. She is coming along.

I'll share a little family story that I may have shared before but who remembers? lol Its like the one Romeena told because it is something we still laugh about as a family. When I was 28 and not yet married, I went on a vacation to Colorado with my parents and aunt. It was a nightmare from the time we left the driveway. As soon as we started out before dawn,(Dad and I in the front seat and mom in the back), Dad says to mom (who was getting hard of hearing), "Did you bring my mug?"..Mom:"Did I bring a rug?!"...Dad(louder): "Did you bring my MUG?!"...Mom (louder, too): "Did I bring a bug?!"...Dad(under his breath):"Oh h#ll! Forget it!". We still use that expression if we cant hear someone, "Did I bring a bug?!".

Well, better get moving. Be Back to chat later, hopefully.

Boo


July 31, 2020 - Msg 115014: Good morning, Porch!

Ahh, a breezy calming heavy mist is blowing across our little valley right now. It's been doing this thru the morning. We got hammered with rain last night for about 2 hours. Boy, did we NEED this!

Boo - HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Your "bug" story is just classic! I wish I could hear your early nursing stories! Sounds like they're for the after hours crowd where there's a two drink minimum and you have to tip the waitress. ;)
Good to hear Erin is doing this good and you have nothing to say but good things! Hope you have a great day! I am nine days removed from the news and it has done wonders for me. I was having anger anxiety.

MDC - See where all the NFL players are opting out of the upcoming season?? Two of the Chiefs starters, one of them being starting RB, Damien Williams, who sealed the Super Bowl win, is one of them. Oh well, not like I care anyway.

I was sitting looking at a weather cam of the Lake of the Ozarks and was thinking of those folks on the lake whose backyard is about 40 feet wide and then it's all lake. They have their dock out their backdoor. I was just daydreaming about sitting on one of those docks with an orange juice in my hand, watching the rain bounce off the water while listening to it rap on the top of the dock. Man...*sigh*...I could do that every day.

Ok, folks...y'all have a great day! Find something good to do, something fun to watch and remember...stay away from the news. It's therapetic!

John Masters
July 31, 2020 - Msg 115015: Happy Birthday, Boo! Hope it's a good one. I took another trip around the sun myself yesterday. Now I'm trying to figure how to plan a social distanced style Double Birthday Bash for us this year like we always have! Maybe we can all meet up at the Remshaw house and everybody party in individual rooms or something- LOL

I am loving the stories,and Asa,yours was a hoot! Most of my best stories come from the years that I worked in the public schools. I could write a book about some of those kids (teachers too) that I worked with! Here's one story that comes to mind:

I was working in a class of mentally challenged/learning disabled kids. Mostly black,but that doesn't matter,only trying to help you picture us in your mind's eye. Anyway, we had spelling words on the board and I was going over them with the students. One girl named Sonya got stuck on the word " JAIL",so trying to help her out I gave her the clue " If you break the law,then you go to..", thinking she'd say "Jail." Well,she stood there and thought about it,and was still drawing a blank,so once more I said " Ok,Sonya,if you break the law,you go to ??"- and she replied:

"You go out and get another one"!!

Ha! I will never forget that,and still laugh about it to myself.

Oh yes, I'm another one who tries to stay away from the news. 90% of it is fake anyhow,and the rest is too much to take on a daily basis.

Y'all have a good day & don't forget about Possum & Boo's Socially Distanced Birthday Bash over at the Remshaw house this weekend!

************
possum u.a.r.

P.S. Sterling, sure am sorry about the troubles you're having. I've been down that road and it's not fun.Take care,friend.
July 31, 2020 - Msg 115016: Good afternoon, porch! And a great big "Happy Birthday!" to Boo. Sounds like things are looking up a bit at your house, and I'm so glad to hear it. I'm praying that things will continue to go well for Erin. Sometimes it just takes a little time. We don't all mature at the same rate. Loved your story! "Did I bring a bug?" That's hilarious, and just tailor-made to become a family joke. And Possum, your story is great, too. It was a perfectly logical response from the child, if you knew what her background might be. Apparently, her family had little or no experience with "inarculation"!

Evidently, we had a big windstorm last night. I don't sleep with my hearing aids in, and this house is very well-insulated, so I didn't hear a thing, but we must have had some very strong wind. The evidence was in the yard when I looked out my window. I have an enormous beach-type umbrella that shades part of the pond, to give the fish a place to go in the heat of the day. The thing is bright red, and is about 8 feet in diameter. There are pieces of PVC pipe sunk into the ground at intervals around the pond, and the shaft of the umbrella just drops down into them to hold it in place. I can move it from one to the other to relocate the shade, as the sun moves across the sky. Well, that umbrella was about 25 feet from where it should have been, lying up against the side fence! Also, my plumeria tree, once again, was tipped over and lying on the ground. The pot full of dirt that the tree lives in weighs about 50 pounds, but it gets blown over fairly often. The tree usually is undamaged, and if a bit of it does get broken off, I can just stick it in another pot of dirt, and it will root and eventually become another little tree. Pretty little things. So, I went out back and put the umbrella back in a pipe, (it's not very heavy), wrestled the tree upright, and all is well. It really must have been a very strong wind though, because I noticed that there was a carpet of crape myrtle blossoms on the ground, and the trees look pretty scanty this morning.

About the news, I'm with you! I canceled my newspaper about a year ago, and I almost never watch TV news. As Possum said, most of it is fake, and I have my doubts about the rest. Why set myself up for aggravation over something that isn't even true? It's sad that it's that way, but it is. There was a time when you could trust the newspapers and newscasts, but Walter Cronkite is gone, and the newspapers are in the Left's pocket, so why bother? There was an honor, an acknowledged obligation to report honestly and to show no bias, but those days are gone. So sad.

Sterling, hang in there as long as you can, but when you know you've done your best, and still there's no peace in your house, then you may have no choice. The divorce threats have been employed for years, and it appears to me that it's just a weapon that gets trotted out now and then. I wonder what would happen if you called her hand? If she saw herself as being alone, responsible for every single thing in her life, no help, no second income, no one at home to keep things done, repaired, mowed, whatever - I wonder what she would do? Have you ever tried that? Could be interesting....

Well, I think I left a nap around here somewhere, maybe in my wheelerette. I think I'll go see if I can find it. Sounds like a plan, and with a warm, soft little dog in my lap, it might just be really enjoyable. Blessings, friends. --Romeena