February 27, 2006 - Msg 34907: Caught three...
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34908: Alot of people lie at lunch, what of it?!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34909: Well, a man does with what he's got ...
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34910: Andy, I forbid you to see that girl!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34911: If you put on clean socks and underwear, it ain't a whim.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34912: Two and two make four.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34913: KISSIN'!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34914: I ain't gonna stand in a stag line with a bunch of slumped-over teenage boys.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34915: Come on, Thelma Lou, let's have a little fun!
(SLAP)
(Andy) You okay, Barn?
Drive, just drive.

February 27, 2006 - Msg 34916: It's just as messed up as it ever waaaaasssss.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34917: Oh, that's swell, Otis.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34918: "The quality of mercy is not strained, it falleth as the gentle rain from heaven ..."

You're not talkin' to a jerk, you know.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34919: Are you just gonna stand there, or are you comin' with me? .... To get them dogs!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34920: I feel naked without it. Oh, sorry Aunt Bea.
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34921: Jubal. Jubal Jubal Jubal. Jooooobal!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34922: Well The Emancipation Proclamation ... uh, was a proclamation's, what it was...
It was about emancipation! What do ya think it was about?! What was it about? Use your head, man. It's common knowledge! There was these folks ... and how else was they gonna get themselves emancipated unless there was a proclamation? So they got themselves a proclamation and they called it The Emancipation Proclamation!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34923: (cough cough) Mulberry squeezin's, (wheeze) that's all it is, Mulberry squeezin's...
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34924: You shouldn't be doin' this Ope! This is a person to person call! Now let me talk to Thelma Lou!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34925: We'll have the boys at the lab look it over and tell whether it came from somewhere else or whether it was a local rock...
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34926: Aww this Boob here comes yellin' "Citizen's arrest, citizen's arrest!"...
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34927: Sure Rafe, you can sing along. (pause) Sing-Along-With-Barn!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34928: You can tell the Guvner to put THAT in his smipe and poke it!
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34929: Oh now don't do that Aunt Bee! Maybe we should loosin' something. Do you have anything we can loosen?
February 27, 2006 - Msg 34930: Andy! Lookit this! Maybe this'll explain why Aunt Bee's been feelin' so good! Well, where there's smoke there's fire-water!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34931: MESSAGE REMOVED

February 28, 2006 - Msg 34932: I look a little rough in my civies.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34933: Yea she's a blonde--from a bottle.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 34934: I THINK I'VE HEARD JUST ENOUGH ABOUT THAT TOMATO!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34935: Balmy and li.. Balmy and li .. Balmy and life-breathing breezes are blowing.

Me-they-me-they-me they

IOU, IOU, IOU

Fa la la la la la la
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34936: Nita--Juaananita

Everybody now: Welcome sweet springtime we greet thee in sooon˜nn˜ngg!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34937: good morning porch. i remember some time in the mid 80's that i saw don knotts up close and wanted to share. floyd might be able to fill in the blanks. i was tapped to be head of security at the center. i was at the entrance ( this was in huntsville, alabama) where don knotts was to appear, i'll never forget that i chose to be the one at the arrival point due to my experience and responsiblity. i expected don knotts to arrive in a limo in my mind. suddlenly this little sports car, i think it was an mg, not a shiny new one. i recognised him as he got closer but he was driving himself and alone. he had his familiar cap. he slowly got out much like you or i would get out and he shook hands signed autographs and went inside. i have always remembered don knotts humanity when a star of his magnitude could have been chauffered, etc but was just barney. well it's the end of feb. breakfast on floyd this morning. we haven't let floyd chose a place for breakfast. andy to barney: junita's your girl, barney she's everybodys girl. prayers for mdc and those in need. buckeye
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34938: Good morning Front Porch. Wow, after reading all of these quotes (and posting a few of my own), it feels like I'm listening to TAGS on the radio. It sure is good to be back home.

Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34939: Hey gang im at work now ....back in just a bit....burger king for lunch.....SPOT
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34940: One of my favorite Barney quotes has to be the time he "accidently" captured an escaped criminal who returned to seek revenge against Barney for sending him to prison in the first place. After the exciting arrest in a barn (with some secret help from Andy), Barney tells Andy "I swallowed my gum!"

Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34941: New prisoner rehabilitation program: "Why, had your twigs been bent in another direction you could've been anything--Sherman--a dentist, Junior--a dancer. I've got a leather craft set, a metal craft set, and a Mr. Potato set. Now c'mon, which one do you want? Makes no difference to me."

"You know that metal craft set ... Aw the dern guy went and made hisself a pass key"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34942: Hey SPOT, don't work too hard.
After reading Msg 34937, I get mad at myself for not making an effort to see Don Knotts in person. Now, I will never have that opportunity again. Excuse me while I get a tissue.

Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34943: These quotes are just wonderful! I couldn't wait to get to my computer this morning so I could read some more. What a great tribute to a great and funny man! Glad you're back Poor Horatio, stick around longer this time. Buckeye, great story. Nice to know our Barn was a HUMBLE man.
Charlotte Tucker
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34944: Hey Charlotte Tucker. Thanks for the welcome back. Sit back, relax, and reminisce about our beloved Barney with all of the great quotes here.

Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34945: Ok--many of those quotes above were from me too. Here's one to start your morning--makes me think of breakfast:

She buttered him up and he egged her on. Have a great day, Mayberry porchsters!

Charlotte Tucker
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34946: I think he's a nut!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34947: One of my faves - the quote above me 34946. And Kai's too. She always laughs at that.
-Sterling Holobyte
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34948: That came out sorta weird--eggs made me think of breakfast.
CT
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34949: What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a man take off a dress before. . .


hm
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34950: Exactillioso!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34951: "Whadda gonna do next, wax the steps at the old folks home?"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34952:
"The tears on my pillow doth bespeak the pain that is in my heart"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34953: Wow, that one got me! I was gonna make a little post to say "hey" to everyone since it was my first time at a tereminal since Don's homecoming. Then I see THAT quote, and dont know what to say.
Your mournful trucker,
Fred Goss
PS- GREAT story Buckeye, that must have been neat-o to see him that way.
Fred Goss
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34954: "Yup, I did my part in the big war."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34955: "OK Otis, hop!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34956: "Rubber baby buggie bumpers"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34957: "Well, you know me. When opportunity knocks, ol' Barn has to take a peek and see if anyone's out on the stoop."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34958: "still ugly, single and pitting prunes."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34959: "That bite of cheese sandwich stuck right here for about 3 days."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34960: Those last 3 quotes submitted by ~ Mrs. Wiley. Barn sure was hard on the ladies, but it was soooo funny!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34961: Good Morning Porch! Remember the Great Drug Store Caper...Walker's Drugstore has been robbed (Wink Wink) Barney arrives with his finger printing kit:

Barney: Ms. Ellie you been robbed?

Ellie: Uh huh.

Barney: Come right in and held ch'ya up did he?

Ellie: Um Humm.

Barney: Good for him!...I mean we'll catch him don't you worry.

Barney: First chance I've had to use the finger printin' kit the state capitol sent us. Finger Print Powder...find the finger prints, find the criminal case closed.

Barney pops open the can of what looks like white talcum powder that goes everywhere and completely covers his face.

Barney coughing: Well he probably wore gloves anyway...don't you worry though I'll have this case closed in 24 hours or my name isn't reliable Barney Fife.

Barney packs up his finger printing case and starts out the door just as Opie is coming in.

Barney: Better stay off the streets Ope.

One of Barney's classic scenes that makes me laugh just thinking about it and typing it in here. I am thoroughly enjoying all the quotes and looking forward to sharing with my family in the TV Land Marathon tonight. Hope everyone here on the Porch is having a great day the Mayberry way! Hey SPOT what's for Lunch...how about something Southern Fried? or Maybe we could go over to the diner for the Business Man's Special...a stuffed tomato with a Lemon Fizz and then we could go over to the Grand and watch them change the Marquee...Barney always enjoyed that and we could do it in his memory!

Thoughts and Prayers for everyone here!

I appreciate it and Good Night!
Smky Mtn Hillbilly

He's a NUT!


February 28, 2006 - Msg 34962: Did I hear someone singing my name???

Good morning Porch, or what's left of it. Hey to CT, POOR HORATIO, BUCKEYE, SMH, MRS. WILEY (how do you do?--sorry, couldn't resist), FRED, SH, HM and anybody else lurking about.

Drat! Missed breakfast at the Cracker Barrel this morning. And it was on SPOT, too. Anybody have a doggie bag to share? Had a doctor's appointment this morning that ran toooooo long. You know what's worse than having to sit in a doctor's waiting room for way yonder too long? Having to do it with bad magazines. There oughta be a law.

Love the quotes. Either someone has a phenomenal memory or a blister on their remote control finger. Just stopped over at Miss Crump's for my daily dose of educashion (it is worth every penny I am paying for it; it's free). Seems an interloper has been running amuk over there recently. Seems like some buds weren't nipped when they should have been. Is it too much to expect people to act like somebody in a public forum? Sheesh.

Oh, well, back to the grind. Talk to all you good people later.

Me-They
"10-4!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34963: "WELL, IF IT AIN'T DADDY LONG-LEGS!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34964: "The light in here does craazy things to your hair."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34965: "I wouldn't touch his Id with a 10 foot pole."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34966: "...well, it's kinda hard on your eyes to watch TV with the lights on. (snicker-snicker)"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34967: "YOU'RE THE ONLY GIRL I LOVE!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34968: Gosh folks, these quotes are great. I can visulize each scene as I read them. What a great legacy the man has left behind to enjoy.

Prisoner: Who are you? What's your name?
Barney: Puddingtame! Ask me again, I'll tell you the same!

or this one

I just don't happen to like my main dish concealed in a heavy sauce!

I loved your quote C.T. about the egging on and buttering up.

Welcome to all the oldtimers returning (Horatio) and new comers joining (Farrah). If there are others, welcome aboard.

Asa
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34969: (regarding Olive's extra tip) "Let's just let her keep it."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34970: Hey, ASA (or should I say, Punddintame?). Shouldn't you be getting some new screws for your gun?

Me-They
"Barney Parney Poo"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34971: Howdy Asa, great to bump into you! How's lil Barney? I'm lovin these quotes too. Keep em coming! ~ Mrs. Wiley
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34972: Okay, now I'm really going back to work. And in case my boss is checking, I'm on a break. But I'm still working with my left hand while I post with my right. And I'm thinkin' about work, too. Yes, I am THAT dedicated.

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34973: "Gas it up, chickie baby."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34974: Me-They, tell your boss you are multi-tasking. They like stuff like that. ~ Mrs. Wiley
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34975:
Andy: Take it easy barney.
Barn: Take it easy, nothin'!! What are they, a bunch of snobs or something?
Andy: Now barney.
Barn: Imagine that! Imagine that! turning down a nice guy like you!

Above quote brought to you by MDC. Romeena, you asked for a quoteathon and it seems like people from all over the country have really obliged ya! This has beeen great. What a wonderful tribute!
Hope you are all doing well. So great to see so many dear old friends.
POOR HORATIO, DES, JELSIK AND others, be sure to check out the porch photo album started by Romeena at
www. romeena.myphotoalbum.com
and look for the porchsters album!
God bless you all and thanks for the prayers.
MDC
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34976:
"Bulbsnatcher!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34977: MRS. WILEY: Yeah, I'll use words like "paradine shift" and "visioning" and watch his eyes start to glaze over. Then I'll slink away.

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34978:
BUCKEYE- Just saw your post on the western site.
Hope all is well. keep us posted. God bless you and yours bro.
Prayers for all you porchsters as we get thru this time of stress. Ya all are in my morning prayers each day!
MDC

Andy: Oh you've been nice, Ben, you've been REAL nice. Hasn't he been nice Barney?
Barney: Oh, he's been a real sweetheart!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34979: M-T , you'd better spell it right. Paradigm-shift. I once worked for an ad agency called paradigm. They were crooks. Visioning is a good'un! ~ Mrs. Wiley
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34980: < > silence < hand shaking > < head nodding> some sacheting and more smiling and head nodding

Those were my amenities.

Charlotte Tucker

February 28, 2006 - Msg 34981: I need advice--I'm having lots of trouble with my msn home page on Internet Explorer and I'm not that fond of it anyway. What's a good home page to have that gives some news headlines, etc.?
Charlotte Tucker
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34982: I just come in for some foot powder.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 34983: MRS. WILEY: Well, with regard to "paradigm," like "Fife," someone was bound to come along and spell it right sooner or later!

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34984: Barney, don't shoot the slingshot in the office....crash!!!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34985: oops! Elmer and Ruth ohio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34986: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA! I am SO lovin' these quotes! Love your last one, CT. I was just remembering the episode of The Remshaw House when Barney and Gomer are standing in the old house and Gomer dissappears. I love the look on Barney's face when he says, "Gomer?.....Gomer?......Gooooooooome???". I really loved Barney in that episode. Whenever Barney got together with Gomer, it was hilarious. One of my other favorites is the campfire scene when Andy tells the story of The Golden Arm and the looks on Barney and Gomer's faces, then you see them lying close to Andy in their sleeping bags with the terrified looks on their faces. That 'un kills me!

Boo
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34987: "Go ahead and hit me, Ope."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34988: Or who could forget that wonderful episode in which Barney poses as a dummy to catch the shoplifter in Weaver's Department Store? That look on his face when one of the shoppers says, "That dummy looks like Barney Fife, only the dummy is better looking!". HAHA!

Wish I could watch the TAGS marathon tonight but I have to help my friend move to another apartment. Lots to do, as usual. I am very, very thankful today for the ability to work and do what has to be done, though. Love to All,

Boo
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34989: Here's a scene I like...Andy is helping Opie and his friends to learn their history, telling them great stories like the midnight ride of Paul Revere. It is suggested they start a history club, and Barney chimes in, "Will you help us?!"
I just love the look on his face and the expression in his voice!

Have a great afternoon all,
Mary Wiggins
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34990: Well it's over, me and ThelmaLou, phhhhhttt!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34991: "Aint you ever seen a guy with his head in a sling before?"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34992: "You and me, let's dance"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34993:
Skippy: BERNIE!
Barn: It's Barney.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34994: "After looking over all the applications and considering all the job requirements, I just want to thank you for this opportunity, cousin Andy"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34995:
Andy: I didnt know you were in Spanish Club?
Barn: Si
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34996: Andy: Luther hold it!
Luther: Huh? What'd you stop us for we's going real good that time.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34997: Andy: Luther you're a little late now and then.
Luther: What'd you say?!
Andy: I say you're late, your draggin'!
Luther: Yes, it sounded real good to me!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34998: Mrs. Wiley! So good to see you. How are you doing? I think I read that you mentioned you had lost your Dad? Is that right? I stayed away from here for a day or two cause I just couldn't handle the idiot poster and I knew I'd say something and just makes things worse so I signed off. Anyway, I hope you are well and you're in my prayers. Barney is doing great, thank you for asking. He's just over 2 years old now and some of that puppy att-itude is leaving, but he's still full of mischeivious fun.
Me They, my bullets are polished, and my gun is fully repaired in honor of Bernard P. Milton Oliver "Tibbs" Fife. I'm gonna miss his snap inspections.:(

Charlotte, I can't hear your ammenanies!:)

Asa

"Andy's got a girl, I got a girl...all gods children got a girl."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 34999: "Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their neighbor"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35000:
(Softly) Oootiss, Otis Campbell, this is your conscience speaking, where did you get the mooonshine..." (sorry, paraphrased)
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35001: Hey Asa, yes, lost Dad this month. We're all OK. I'm hanging in there...lots to look after now and 2 bad arms to look after it with. s'Ok though, the Good Lord is watching over us. Hard to believe yer pup is 2 now... time sure flies.

~ Mrs. Wiley
"ALRIGHT! BUG INSPECTION!!"

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35002:
My condolences to you Mrs Wiley. Seems a lot of us have been in that boat lately. My mom's pneumonia this past weekend gave us quite a scare, but she is much better now!
APB FOR BUCKEYE, DIXIE, KY GIRL, OK GIRL, ED SAWYER, ALYCE, IRISHSTER, AFD, QUIET SAM, SLIM AND others!
Prayers for you and yours.
MDC
"Hey, who's been messin' with the bulletin board?"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35003: "Really Andy, it's alright, I'll watch the prisioner tonight!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35004: "SHAKEDOWN!"

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35005: This is great. Keep 'em comin.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35006: "Ya gotta understand, sheriff taylor is more than a sheriff to this town, he's a FRIEND..."
(So take THAT, Mister JACKSON!) (:
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35007: You see Opie, it ain't only the materialistic things in this world that makes a person rich. There's love and friendship. That can make a person rich.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35008: (Andy speaking to Barney)
"Barney, you're gettin' all steamed up over this. Why don't you just take the rest of the day off? Go on over to the drug store and have a nice lunch. The business man's special is a hollered out tomato stuffed with avacodo and raisins. It's good too! Then top things off with a lemon phosphate and you're right in business. Take a walk on over to the Grand, watch 'em change the marquee. Well you always enjoyed that!"

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35009: Yeah, that's me, Barney SUCKER! It's open season on Barney Fife! C'mon everybody, let's all take a bite out of Barney Fife!

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35010: Please don't think that my Msg 35009 is an assault on Barney. It's a real quote from the episode when he gets his employment check and notices how much taxes were withheld from his pay.

Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35011: Mr. Tucker: "This is the twentieth century! Don't you realize that? The whole world is living in a desperate space age. Men are orbiting the earth. International television has been developed. And here...a whole town is standing still because two old women's feet fall asleep!"
Barney: "I wonder what causes that."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35012: (Barney speaking to Andy during a tender moment)
Barney: "Well, I'll take my chances. I was almost out to the car and ... well I got to rememberin' another time a few years back when another Mayor of our town accused you of havin' a 'hair-brained idea'. Remember that? That was when you had the idea of ... makin' me your deputy."

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35013: BARN: An officer......
ANDY: Of..
BARN: An officer of..........
ANDY: An officer of.....the.
BARN: An officer of the........................
ANDY: ........................................of the.....what?
BARN: An officer of the what.....that don't sound right.
ANDY: It ain't right. An officer of the .... law.
BARN: Right, right. An officer of the law..........
ANDY: Shall.
BARN: shall.....
ANDY: Enforce the law....and order without regard to
BARN: ..........................law...........order.................regard
ANDY: to personal welfare and safety.
BARN: ........personal.....welfare....and safety.
ANDY: You want to go over it again or do you think you got it?
BARN: I got it.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35014: :) This is too much!

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35015: Barney: "Now why'd ya do that, Andy? Now you know she was guilty. I seen her do it. Now she's gonna go out and tell all her friends how she got away with it and next thing ya know people's gonna be jay-walkin' all over the place and disregardin' 'keep off the grass' signs and everything. Well Mayberry's just gonna turn into a regular SIN TOWN!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35016: BARNEY: It's a wilderness out there and every so often a beast of prey comes sneaking in. Now, it's my job as a lawman to stalk him and run him out. That's my number one job...stalking, not fly-killin'.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35017: BARNEY: Who died and left you boss!? Why don't you go sit in the grocery store so we'll know you're the big cheese!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35018: BARN: Nip it! You go read any book you want on the subject of child discipline and you'll find every one of them is in favor of bud nipping.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35019: BARN: I don't like it. I don't like it one bit. I tell you, this is just the beginning. Going around breaking street lamps! City property, mind you. Next thing you know they'll be on motorcycles and wearing them leather jackets and zooming around. They'll take over the whole town! A reign of terror!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35020: "I'm not senistive...Who said I'm sensitive?"

M-T
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35021: Barney: She said the room was warm and turned out the light and boom I'm engaged!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35022: BARNEY: Yeah, well, we told a few people but we didn't want to make a big moulage out of it.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35023: BARNEY: (snoring)
ANDY: HOW YOU DOIN', BARN?
BARN: Andy. Hhh.
ANDY: Asleep?
BARN: Nawh, I was just watchin' traffic.
ANDY: How da' ya' watch traffic with your eyes closed?
BARN: They weren't closed. I just had 'em squinched up so they couldn't see me lookin'.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35024: What's the charge?
Vagrancy and loitering.
Barney, the Mayor?!
Hello, Franklin, how's things over at the bank?

Asa--is that how you spell ammenanies?
Charlotte Tucker (the editor)

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35025: Aw, go up an alley and holler FISH!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35026: No words to this one, but when Andy puts the four corners of the blanket under the four bedposts and Barney tries to get out, is just priceless!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35027: "There goes on of the great romances of all time."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35028:
Andy: Barn, you asleep?
Barn: Asleep? Who can sleep with all this snorin' goin' on!
(paraphrased)
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35029:
"You beat everthing, you know that?"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35030: Look, I'll go get the ice cream if you want me to.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35031: scene where barney was showing how good gomer was drawing his pistol, when gomer threw the pistol threw the bookcase barney told gomer, if you can;t handle one of these you shouldn't have a gun. andy at desk. barney fast draws his slammed it in his holster and it goes off. trivia: how many episodes which the bookcase got busted? supper on poor horatio. buckeye
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35032: scene where andy asks barney if he wants the cannon, you beat everything, you know that? what kind of a dumbbell do you think i am?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35033: you have to nip this thing in the bud andy, just nip it in the bud!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35034: IT'S ME! IT'S ME! ERNIST T.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35035: MISS CRUMP I LUV YOU!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35036: BARNEY: YOU KNOW I THINK ANDY,I THINK HE'S A NUT!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35037: andy: shut up barney!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35038: my all time favorite is where ms emma wanted her pill and barney picks up the FUN GIRLS
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35039: Best to all. My all times fav is "opie The Birdman" when Barn is telling Opie about how birds can commnicate with each otherand Barney starts whistling and in the smae episode when he talks about the tiger hunters on Afican Safaris using tweezers so heart warming












February 28, 2006 - Msg 35040: Let's let Andy make the scene!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35041: Message 35000, no need to apologize, you were close, and you reminded me of a favorite Barney quote. I'm paraphrasing a bit here, too, but between all of us we'll get this one right eventually:

Otis ... Otis Campbell ... where did you get the liquor? Where did you get the liquor?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35042: Barney: No more carefree hours ... no more doin' what you want, when you want ... no more peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Little boy: Why can't you have peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in jail?

Barney: Where did it all begin?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35043: Don't talk to me, boy, I'm mad! They turned me down!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35044: Things are lookin' PRETTY rosy...
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35045: NO effective counter-measures.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35046: He's out on a 6-12 .... well, I can tell you this much, it's two 3's and two 6'.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35047: in 046, make that "two 6's."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35048: Now cut that out!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35049: You know, somebody kinda nave ....
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35050: How would you like to go to the dance in the company of a young laaaaaady?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35051: Don't worry, Andy knows what he's doing ... I hope.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35052: Standin' in the blazin' sun, lookin' like a dang fool ...
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35053: 'course, I forgot it as soon as it happened.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35054: We're not arguing, we're just ... discussing.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35055: It ain't me I'm worried about ... it's Andy.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35056: We gotta talk about our stocks and our bonds and stuff.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35057: Yeah, next to hunting there's nothing I like more than a good game of golf out on the links.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35058: Yep, that's what we're here for, to have a little look-see.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35059: Now that we know where you are, we won't be strangers.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35060: I don't see what the big deal is, a club's a club ... Ah, that's the Esquire Club.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35061: Yeah, Rog is one of us.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35062: Sara, can you hold this line open? I'm expecting a call from the state capitol ... well it's kind of official!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35063: I did not say gold!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35064: No, Sara, I didn't say anything about payday.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35065: Think I'LL go get a cup of COFFEE!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35066: He was 13th, 14th, somewhere in there.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35067: Yeah, well, we did win, didn't we?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35068: And it's against the law to take the law into your own hands!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35069: You're talking to reliable Barney Fife!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35070: Love you too much, too much ... Turned to another, turned right to another ... Oh, she was wily ... That's me in a nutshell.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35071: Hey Romeena,hazel,Boo,bulbsnacher,Mavis,goober,mdc,md and all....GOOD ept on tv land right now "the pickel story".....mac and cheese for a snack...SPOT
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35072: You're the only girl I ever ... gave a hoot for.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35073: Hey M-T missed ya in there you too mw and ct....SPOT
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35074: Marathon is on TV Land! Everybody pull up a rocker and we will watch it together! Like SPOT said the Pickle story is on. (Thanks for the snack SPOT)

Barney: I don't know how I can face the future with 8 quarts of those pickles in it.

I appreciate it and Good Night!
Smky Mtn Hillbilly
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35075: That is a TAGS marathon in honor of Mr. Don Knotts.

SMH
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35076: How is this for great clients.....Most of my people know I am a huge Andy fan, how could they not, I quote the show all the time, have the ringer on my phone that whistles the tune! (I have Bonanza too) anyway, I had 3 of the 4 tell me they were sorry to hear about Don Knotts today! THAT is why I love this town, alot like Mayberry in alot of ways.
*Mavis
Sheriff's Office
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35077: Hey to the porch! I am loving these quotes...

Mavis...I'm like you. It has really suprised me the number of people who have come to and called my office to tell me how sorry they are. I have lots of Barney/Don pics and even a barney light switch cover in my office. It's very touching that people notice those things. :-)

Keep em coming...

Ya'll be good...

Goober...
YO!!!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35078: barn at the Rimshaw place: Any old tramps down there (slams door) None down there...

Goober...
YO
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35079: oops..

Goober...
YO!!!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35080: Tell me about Myra Koontz.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35081: "I got my eyes on our bird right now!"

"GO GO GO GO GO!"
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35082: Andy: Little Old ladies shouldn't clink

Barney: Unless they are headed to the clink!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35083:
Thanks to TV LAND for the extra episodes tonight. Sure have enjoyed watching them with you all here on the porch.
The little tribute between episodes was very good also: DEPUTY...LANDLORD...FRIEND

Good to see you all...Be blessed!
--REV.

February 28, 2006 - Msg 35084: All that wonderful TAGS to watch & they switch to "What's Happenin?" now THAT should be a crime!
*Mavis
I need to clean this crock
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35085: My old voice teacher used to say A Choir without a Tenor is like a star without it's gleamor...Know who said that...my old voice teacher

SMH
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35086: A local station here has TAGS on now...episode where Greendale is looking for a new sherrif and Deputy Barney Fife of Mayberry is it! Gonna Watch and Enjoy! Ya'll come on down to the Hillbilly side of the porch and watch with me!! I am not as good of a cook as SPOT but I'll fix us some Cheese Popcorn and a Cold Soda water.

Barn: Why don't you go up to the hospital some night and take the bolts out of the Wheel Chairs for some laughs.

Smokey Mtn Hillbilly
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35087: Yeah, "What's Happenin'!" stunk 25 years ago. They need to ditch that one.
I just put on my TAGS DVDs...the one where Peggy's old friend Don comes around. He's talking with his mouth full...ugh.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35088: "...the teacher I had when I studied voice."
- Hazel
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35089: You think all I am good for is chalkin' tires and helping kids across the street
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35090: It's "therapetic."
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35091: Thanks Hazel for making sure I didn't misquote Barn.

SMH
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35092: Great marathon tonight, just wish it was longer. I went ahead and got my box of tissues out cause I knew I'd need them. Loved the bit TVLand did for Don Knotts, I think I cried everytime it came on. Mavis, I know what you mean about the towns you live in, cant tell you the phone calls I got from people wondering if I'd heard or not. Just makes Mayberry that much more special I guess. Hope you all are doing better, as always this porch has helped me more than anything. You guys are the greatest. Love and prayers to everyone here.--Salty Dog
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35093: During those tributes between the shows tonight, it really finally hit me that Don is gone. I was fortunate enough to be there with Andelina when Don got that award at the TV Land Awards in Hollywood.

jennieboone
"I was a Pawn in the Hands of a Wily Woman"
TAGSRWC Chapter
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35094: Howdy all you wonderful people! The quotes are still great.

I had to miss the TAGS marathon tonight (Boo-Hoo). My poor friend who is a single mom needed
help moving but when we got the 24 foot U-Haul packed full, she couldn't find the keys to drive it! It was too late to get another one and we still had a bunch to move. What a nightmare. She is supposed to be out by 8am....not happening.

Been a long day, I think I'll turn in. I have been thinking alot about Barney today, even more that yesterday. There will never be another Barney.

Boo


February 28, 2006 - Msg 35095: Gosh, my sister was the only person that called to find out if I knew that Don had passed. I mentioned it to a few people and they looked at me like they couldn't care less. I think some of my friends and family just don't understand my love for all things Mayberry. Everytime I watch TAGS, my dad says, "I can't believe it. Again?!".

Boo
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35096: I sent the TAGS videos to my mother who lives in England. She and Dad retired there after being in the Air Force for 26 years. She was disappointed that TAGS was never shown in England. Anyway, my then 5-year-old nephew would watch TAGS with her; he told her that he wished he could live in Mayberry. :'o)
He also LOVED Ernest T. Bass.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35097: There goes a happy NUT.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35098: I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on earth.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35099: You know, a flunky, a stooge.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35100: To Mrs. Wiley (Msg 35001), my condolensces on the loss of your father.

To Asa (Msg 34968), thanks for the welcome back.

To MDC (Msg 34975) thanks for the Romeena photo album link. I had trouble with it until I removed that single space.

To Charlotte Tucker (Msg 34981), for a concentration on U.S. news, try CNN.COM or USATODAY.COM. If you want more world news, try REUTERS.COM. If you want more local news, check out your local newspaper, television or radio station web sites.

And a welcome to anyone else I may have missed.

from Poor Horatio
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35101: I never cracked. Yep, I been called everything from mad dog to [help me out here folks]. But there's one thing they never called me ... tattletale.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35102: Well it don't take much strength to throw a checkerboard across the porch and call old Chester Jones a two-faced cheatin' liar at the top of his lungs.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35103: Sewer inspector? Well that old buzzard, he had a lot of nerve.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35104: Hey, Andy. You notice something about that guy? The way he talks. I don't think he's from around here. Matter of fact, I think he's from ... somewhere's else.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35105: Ohhhhhhhhhh, I ought never to drink.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35106: Busy, busy, busy!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35107: I don't believe in falsifyin'.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35108: Does it have to .... BE anything?
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35109: I'm a trained noticer.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35110: I ran second to your first in the county penmanship contest.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35111: Well, sure, "Pickups and Splashes from Floor and Pool." Well, it only ran that once ... it was way ahead of its time. It was too controversial.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35112: I'd be careful who I talk to around here if I was you. There's a jewel thief running around.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35113: Andy: Barney Fife, M.D.?
Barney: Mayberry Deputy!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35114: Next time you move choir practice, you oughta let a fellow know!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35115: Andy and I don't want nothin' fancy ... just plain, solid gold.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35116: I've got this feeling we're gonna ... blow it. I'm just afraid word might ... leak out.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35117: NO COMMENT!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35118: See, she married late in life, and she had this skin condition that lasted well into her thirties. It made her bitter.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35119: Otis: Yeah?
Barney: Yeah!
Otis: Yeah?
Barney: Yeah!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35120: Andy, you can't deliver a baby!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35121: Africa. It was about Africa.
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35122: I'm not gonna crawl!
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35123: Night Porch, got dogs to groom tomorrow & band audition tomorrow night, will talk to you all then
*Mavis
February 28, 2006 - Msg 35124:
Boo... Believe me, I can understand what you are saying; Some of my family also can't believe I watch TAGS "over & over". But it's a way for me to just get away from the worries of the world. It's like being in Mayberry.

See ya'll at breakfast
--REV.
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35125: Andy this is it. There's one cap...one badge...one revolver...and one bullet
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35126: Goog morning Gang!!early bird here at work this morning...4:30 came early..her Rev,Mavis,Ro,md,ct,mdc,Mw and all new and regulars...McDonalds for breakfast...well let me get settled in...
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35127: signedSPOT...sorry
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35128: Mornin' Y'all. I sure enjoyed the TVLand tribute last night.Fluctuated between tears and laughter the whole time. I'm sure I was in good company.
Boo,my sister was also the only one who called to check on me after hearing the news. First thing out of her mouth was " I just called to see if you were in mourning." I told her yeah,that I'd been crying ever since my daughter phoned me with the news.
Yesterday I heard folks speaking of Don Knotts in a doctor's office waiting room and a restaurant.He certainly made a big impact on so many people. It was two middle aged black men in the waitng room and two young white girls in the restaurant.Everybody loved Barney!
Well,hope everyone has a nice day-gonna be upper 70's here on the SC end of the porch!
*****SMILES******
possum under a rock
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35129: Hey Possum...and all my other Porch Friends!

It will be cold, and possible freezing rain and snow later on tonight into tomorrow around these here parts....

Here was my smile for the day...

Last night, my 8 year old Opie and I were watching the "Pickles" episode on TV Land. My son decided he wanted pickles for a snack right then and there, but all I had was an old jar with one pickle in it (probably a lot nastier than Aunt Bea's!). This morning, I noticed the scrawled 8-year old writing on my grocery list of my son with one word- PICKLES -. He has never, ever, made an addition to my grocery list until last night! I laughed when I saw it.

Have a Mayberry Delightful Day!
Mary Wiggins
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35130: Morning Porch! Hope you all have a blessed day today, supposed to be beautiful on my end of the porch today, close to 70! And what do I have to do? Work. Dadgum it! Bulbsnatcher never did hear from you, what happened to ya? Holler at me K9HairDesign@comcast.net
Where is Ro? Check in, getting worried about ya! Off to put my face on, think I should wear earrings?
*Mavis
Me & Barney ain't
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35131: Hey Mary Wiggins didn't see ya there.
*Mav
March 01, 2006 - Msg 35132: Just be sure you get that young 'un Good old store bought pickles teehee