March 28, 2002 - Msg 5925: Mornin', all! I think I'm gonna open a new business - Romeena's Rent-A-Plum. That way folks who don't have a Sugarplum in their life could rent mine for a few hours, and I could GET SOME PEACE! Honestly, that little barkin' machine is about to drive me to distraction this morning. A small crew is doing some minor road work out front, and she just can't stand it. Can't see them, just hears them, and imagines they're a big threat. Silly little thing.
Good to hear that the ones on our "worry list" are improving. I spoke to the grandson in Guantanamo, and he's okay. Also, my daughter-in-law's sister - the one who was mysteriously paralyzed - is much improved. Even made it to church last week, using a walker and lots of help. Still no definitive diagnosis. Curious, curious, curious!
Saw the Inside TV Land thing about TAGS. Odd that Frances Bavier didn't like Andy, but it's nice that she finally called him and apologized. Actually, it's a tribute to her acting ability, because she always appeared to just dote on him. Made it believable.
Well, dear friends, have a blessed Mayberry Day. And now, I think I'll go put a bucket on the Plum's head. Maybe it'll muffle her just a bit, if nothing else.--Romeena
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5926: WHEW! I got swept away! Kinda makes your head spin, to get swept right in the middle of your posting!--Romeena
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5927: Fine Citizens of Mayberry:

Just tried to address the public for the first time in many months, but my posting was rejected becaused I used the word "*ssured" (substitute the * for the letter a) because of the first three letters of the word.

My post spoke of spring, gardens, and flowers.

Has my beloved Mayberry become a Communist state that even the words *ssumed, *ssured, *ssail, *ssult can be used!

I call for an *ssembly in the town square, by the old oak, in order that we as a democratic town lead an *ssault on this too far censorship. Together, as a united *ssociation, we will take *ssuage.

Rise Citizens of Mayberry. The freedom of our speech is under *ssault!

Mayor Pike
(a fine Christman man who never used a foul word in life - well there was that time.....)



March 28, 2002 - Msg 5928: Has anyone noticed? The star of Indiana bassketball team that is in the N.C.A,A. final four this week is named Fife. Barney would be swelling with pride!
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5929: Has anyone noticed? The star of Indiana bassketball team that is in the N.C.A,A. final four this week is named Fife. Barney would be swelling with pride
As Barney would say,"don't suprise me none,us Fifes was always wirey."
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5930: Evening porch. Been an extremely busy, hectic work day & haven't had a chance to post. Could use a nice dinner from the diner right now & a sip from Briscoe Darling's jug wouldn't hurt either. Have a nice evening & best of luck to you & yours. Leon
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5931: assult?
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5932: I love the "Andy Griffith Show"! See, my dad is an
Andy Griffith show-aholic! Ever since i was really
little, we would get home and watch Andy Griffith.
Guess what? We still do! :)
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5933: Did anyone see Rob Reiner in the printer's office on Goober's Contest today on TV Land?
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5934: Sorry about that, Mayor, but I can't seem to get a filter to work that doesn't catch words with "a$s" in them. --Allan
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5935: Hey Mayor, I assume that I have assulted your association and fixed the problem. --Allan
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5936: Evening porch! Fine sweeping job there Floyd & I like how you settled the Mayor right down, you got talent, you know that. Romeena be glad you just have ONE barking machine! I have 3 of them (the oldest, Blarney only barks at the cows) let a tractor go by here & it sounds like the world is fixing to cave in!! (remember friends I live in the country so a tractor going by is as common as a car going by) Look at it this way, they ARE protecting us from the big mean things in the world!
*Mavis
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5937: Like the postman? (heehee)--Romeena
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5938: Seriously, I do appreciate the Plum's efforts to protect me. I just wish I could hush her when I've had enough protection. I tried the mute button on my remote, but it didn't work!--Romeena
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5939: She's typically quite obedient, understands regular speech as opposed to "commands", but "be quiet" means nothing to her. It's as though I can hear her saying "But Mom, but, but, you just don't understand! This is big, I mean BIG, and I just have to bark!"--Romeena
March 28, 2002 - Msg 5940: Hey porch, off to bed now. But I had to stick my head out here and tell yall nite. As for those barking machines I got one of them too. He may be small but his mouth makes up for it. We have neighbors that ride horses up the road and mine just has a fit. He will not hush. It's like man what a big dog that is!! And Mavis tractors go by all the time here too. They need to have a tractor lane sometimes. Well yall have a good nite and a "Good" Friday. Back to work in the morning for me but I did enjoy my day off and thanks to Asa for not singing this morning. Nite Porch--Salty Dog
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5941: I know some people consider the Andy Griffith Show to be "hokey and unrealistic", but I do see parallels between the episodes and "real life". In this day and age, as horrible as some treat one another.....you always find your neighbor "haulin' your groceries in the squad car when you were too sick to get them yourself". I still find inspiration in every episode, and hope. --Firespray
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5942: Morning porch. Firespray, I agree with you. There is a lot of hope and inspiration in every episode. I think what I like about it best is the lengths that the characters go to to not hurt each other feelings. Like with Aunt Bee's pickles. Or Barneys singing. Their friends and family will do anything to not hurt their feelings. It's a good goal to have in life. Oh, coffees on, everybody. Stop by on yer way to work.
- Hazel
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5943: Good morning Hazel, and the porch. Good Friday is upon us. I hope you all have a wonderful Easter weekend. I don't know about you, but I just love about everything this time of year.
Sorry you have to work Salty. Hope you get Easter off.
I'll be over for some hot choclate Hazel. Coffee give me tummy turmoil. You got any danish to go with that?
Love hearing them plumpster stories Romeena. We have one of them little weener dogs that makes up for his small stature with his big ol mouth. He thinks he has a personal battle to settle with the vacum everytime we bring it out. Or the lawn mower, or the sprinklers, or my power tools, or anything else out of the ordinary. We let him out one day to do his business and after a few heard him barking like mad. Went out to see what was wrong. He was doing a stand off with a dandelion that had bloomed over night. He knew it hadn't been there before so it must be an intruder. Wacky dog, but we love him.
Floyd, could I get a haircut before Easter?
Love you all and have a great day and weekend.

Asa
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5944: Hey to the Porch.
--Jelsik the Bulkhead
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5945: Hey to everybody on the porch! I hope you all have a great weekend and a Happy Easter! I was thinking about how much I love to color Easter eggs and it put me in mind of Opie's line "Paw, just what CAN you do with a grown woman?" Well, you can color Easter eggs and have an Easter egg hunt with a grown woman. I still love doing that every Easter. Mavis, you just let me know when your band is playing at Hansonville and I'll be there.
--Emma
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5946: Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
I just hope you all have a wonderful Seater weekend.
I have been spring breaking this week and boy did I need it!

The best sermon I ever heard. . ."It's Friday, but Sunday is coming!"

homemaker
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5947: By the way - since I've been scarce on the porch. . .why don't you all come over for Sunday brunch?!
homemaker
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5948: That brunch sounds dandy, homemaker! Count me in. We've missed you! I love the dog stories Romeena, Asa, Mavis, and anyone else who mentioned their dog. Our is wacky like yours, Asa. He is fierce mean barks and nips at strangers but he's really scared to death of most everything. He sleeps in his cage on our back porch at night. Loves that cage! He's only 9 months old. One day he was outside just barkin' to beat all. Barked nearly all afternoon. Finally checked it out and there he was barking fierce-like at a new garbage receptacle they had dropped off! Silly dog. Firespray, just who thinks Andy Griffith is hoky and unrealistic?? Are there really folks out there that think that way? I feel sorry for them. Like Hazel said if more folks tried so hard not to hurt their friends' feelings, the world would be a better place. (Brings up our ugly basketball episode with the little girls! I wish I'd forget about that!) No sense dwellin' on the past. Ya'll have a fine day. : )
Charlotte Tucker
P.S. I think this is a mighty "windy" post.

March 29, 2002 - Msg 5949: Is she pretty? She's nice. She's nice? Real nice. Ya say she's pretty? and Nice, real nice.
Which reminds me, is Nice Real Nice Mary Grace ever on this porch?
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5950: Morning porch, off to work again today. Then got a family food thing tonight afterwards. Asa, I do have Easter day off. We are gonna grill out with my best friend and her husband and all our"kids". The furry ones that is. I loved the dog stories too. Mine barked his fool head off over a grass hopper one day. We thought he had found a snake and had been bitten. But here he was bouncing around and yapping like crazy. Everytime the grasshopper would jump, so would he. Well yall have a good and safe weekend. See ya after work--Salty Dog
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5951: boy giraffes are selfish. they're not like dogs.
Burferd
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5952: HOORAY! Howard Sprauge bowled a 300.




HOORAY! Howard Sprauge bowled a 300! Who's gonna win? Who's goona win? Mayberry,Mayberry Mayberry!!! SAM SCOTT




March 29, 2002 - Msg 5953: HOORAY! Howard Sprauge bowled a 300.




HOORAY! Howard Sprauge bowled a 300! Who's gonna win? Who's goona win? Mayberry,Mayberry Mayberry!!! SAM SCOTT




March 29, 2002 - Msg 5954: Afternoon Porch! Glad to know I am not the only one with goofy dogs (get it, Goofy?...dog? Walt Disney?) I could take up the whole porch with stories about what my kids do, now you can add a little Green Cheek Conure to the mix & you got a real bang up time here at the Neff household! that little bird is a funny thing! Hope you all have a great Easter! And don't eat too many eggs. Firespray welcome to the porch! & Hey back atcha Jelsik
*Mavis
Don't the trees seem nice & full?
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5955: Oh and Emma I will let you know when we will be in Hansonville, we are looking at maybe another week? Not sure yet, gotta talk to the big man up there to find out.
*Mavis
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5956: Hello neighbors.
Just walking by.
-Sterling Holobyte
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5957: Hello neighbors.
Just walking by.
-Sterling Holobyte
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5958: Hello Peeps! everyone is looking well and happy, got any bug spray?
Happy
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5959: word up
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5960: My where is everyone tonight? Good Friday celebrations I guess.
March 29, 2002 - Msg 5961: I always enjoy ANDY...barney with his nip it...nip it in the bud....I wonder if they try to do the show in 2002 would it work?
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5962: Good morning Porch! I tried to say 'hey' to our little fat mayor - but the Editor kept getting me so I gave up. But "hey" to our little fat mayor, to Beloved Jelsik, to Dearest Asa, Mavis, Ro, Charlotte, Salty, Sterling and Happy...did I miss anyone?

Yes, it was a Good Friday. I had planned to take it easy, do a Dr. appt, then have a liesurely breakfast, some shopping, then Church in the afternoon. But nooOOOO! I received my Good Friday "Cross". Got sick at the Hospital in the middle of my test - it would have been a big embarrasing mess if they didn't have one of those little kidney-shaped buckets handy. Was sick all day.

~ Mrs. Wiley
"sick as a dog, but havin the time of my life!"

March 30, 2002 - Msg 5963: Mornin' porch! I'm surprised to be the second one up this morning. I usually get up pretty early by all you on EST are usually ahead of me when it comes to the coffee. So, I'll put it on this mornin'. Poor Mrs. Wiley. So sorry your day off turned out so. Maybe you need some of Emma's pills. Let's ask Miss Ellie if she'll give you some. Maybe you just need to eat some fried chicken and such. I'm gonna be tryin' to work today. I keep gettin' lots of small rush jobs (that's a good thing) but they are keepin' me from my maps (which are due in May)! So I gotta stay on it! Everybody have a great day and a blessed Easter. By the way Fun Girl, how's little Opie these days?
Charlotte Tucker
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5964: Morning Porch. Morning Mrs. Wiley. That sounds like no fun at all you poor dear. Hope the rest of your weekend goes better. Let us know what we can do to help.
Morning Charlotte, sounds like you have a full day planned. Slow down, take it easy, whats your hurry?
I have me a date on the golf course in just a little bit. My am I looking forward to that. Then it's home to plant more stuff in the garden. Then I am gonna power rake the grass. Yep, thats the plan, golf, garden, and rake. It's a fun day all way around.
Good to hear from you Homemaker. Don't be a stranger. Hope things is better for you to FunGirl and for Opie to.
Well you all have a good day and may the Lord bless you all.

Asa
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5965: Morning. You missed me up there, Mrs. Wiley. But that's ok. Me, sensitive! Boy, that's a nice thing to get started around. If there's anything that upsets me, it's having people say I'm sensitive. There's one thing I'm not - sensitive! Talk about being misunderstood. Everybody have a good day.
- Hazel
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5966: Mrs.Wiley want me to brang you some chicken soup? I got some opposum soup but it willlay on yer chest, & you don't need that when yer ailin' Hazel I'll be sure if I hear anyone say you are sensitive I'll set them straight in a hurry! Where is Salty Dog this morning, she is usually up & at em first thing. Charlotte that was some mighty fine coffee, can you put on a 2nd pot, around here I keep a pot going all day long. Reckon that is why I am so hyper???? Off to clean the house dadgum it, I clean, it gets dirty, I clean & it gets dirty, wonder what causes that??
*Mavis
toot-toot tootsie don't cry!

March 30, 2002 - Msg 5967: Afternoon porch, sorry I am so late in gettting this posted but I am having a time of it here. We were at some friends of ours last night working on their race cars. His wife and I had walked outside to feed the horses and donkeys and had been out side the garage for a while just talking. Well my right eye was bothering me and I just thought it was some new eye liner I had bought well anyway in less than an hour, my eye was swelled completely shut. I put drops in it last night and took some benadryl but by this morning it was swelled shut again. So I missed my first day of work in over a year and a half. My boss wasn't too upset with me. It has finally opened enough to let me see a little bit out of it. But it is still swelled so bad that I look like something off the sci fi channel. Dont know what caused it either. It wasn't the horses cause I have been around them all my life. Well I am gonna get off here and see if I can see enough to wash them dishes. Any Ideas to reduce swelling of the eyes?? Id be much oblidge. Tried tea bags and cucumbers too but it aint helped so far. Didn't mean to be complaining so much today but it has been one of those days. Hope you are doing better Mrs. Wiley. Come on over and we'll feel sorry for each other. I am off here for now hopefully I'll "see" yall later--Salty Dog

"Gas it up Chickie"
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5968: Hi Salty, put a hunk of meat on it. Sounds like a spider bite to me. they're little and can blow in on a breeze or drop from a tree. Or some pollen or something blew in there. You keep an eye on it...HAHAHA! Hey to Hazel, sorry I missed ya honey. Don't be sensitive. Mavis, chicken soup sounds swell, thanks! I'll pass on the opossum - lil too greazy for my tummy. Y'all are real sweet to worry over me.

~ Mrs. Wiley
"...every book I've ever read on child rearin' is in favor of bud nippin'!"

March 30, 2002 - Msg 5969: Thanks Mrs. Wiley, EYE'LL try that!! You are a real REYEot you know that??--SD
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5970: Salty, why don't you ask Homemaker if she knows what's wrong with your eye. She's a teacher, she might know. Or you could ask Floyd, he's a barber.
- Hazel
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5971: HAHAHAHAHA Ya'll are funny. Poor old Salty, walking around like Popeye and we all be teasing her. Good thing she has a sense of humor. I like that Mrs. Wiley, keep an eye on it. LOL.
Hope it gets better soon Salty. Try sleeping with a marble under your pillow. Johnny Paul says that will cure all eye disease.

Asa
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5972: ((((Hazel)))) You are too funny! Salty, hope your eye is better, someone said spider and that sounds about right, that or a tick! Do get medical attention if it isn't better soon. Mrs. Wiley, don't know what you are miss'in on that opossum stew! I got some goats gizzard fritters that might be just what the doctor ordered! Them'is real good with some horsey sauce! Geez I've have eat so many shelled peanuts at this here computer I already got ripples all over my body! Hate it when that happens! Hahahahahahaha!
Asa, ain't never heard of the putting marbles under ones pillow, dated lots of men with them in their head......(Grin)
Happy
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5973: Salty Dog, if that eye isn't right by Monday, see the doctor. Your eyesight is a precious gift and important sense.
Mrs. Wiley, here are some of Emma's miracle pills @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@.
Hope that helps.
I don't have barkers, I have meowers. At meal time they all tune up together. My most vocal is Peanut who meows a lot. Missy talks to the birds.
Sweetie meows when she wants to play. Boo takes spells. Baby doesn't meow much, she kind of squeaks. They run when loud noises come by the house. We've lived here a long time and they still get scared of the train passing. Big trucks and those blamed loud radios !
Happy Easter. Remember Jesus is the reason for Easter. Thank you Lord for your mercies.
Miss Ellie
PS. NRNMG posts occassionally.

March 30, 2002 - Msg 5974: Boy, we sure got the ailments on this porch today! I'm with them Salty, better get that eye looked at. Is it any better? How are you feelin' Mrs. Wiley after all this TLC? Miss Ellie, how many cats you got? We just have one. The kids named her Mittens but she really doesn't have anything on her that looks like mittens! She's a pretty orange, white, and black calico.
Emma, the kids and I colored Easter Eggs yesterday. We did some of the old Paas kind that you put the tablets in water and vinegar and then we did some that you paint with a sponge. They all turned out real pretty. I like doing that more than they do I reckon. Everybody have a blessed Easter!
Charlotte Tucker
Glad to hear that NRNMG posts occasionally. What about pinkcloud?
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5975: Howdy, friends! I'm up late, coloring eggs. No one here but me and the Plum, and still I'm coloring eggs! Some habits are hard to break. Charlotte, I use the Paas dyes, too, have used them for 40 years. Do you ever dye any brown eggs? I do half white and half brown, and you'd be amazed at how beautiful the colors turn out on brown eggs. Whole new spectrum!
Salty, you need to get that eye tended to. It does sound like some sort of bite, since it seems just one eye is involved. An allergy would hit them both, most likely. Check it out, honey. And I love the word picture of your furkid barking at the grasshopper. I can just see it.
Mrs. Wiley, you poor thing! How awful. Honestly, I'll take pain over nausea every time. I spent one full nauseated year while on chemo 22 years ago, and I really don't want to ever do that again. Hope you're feelin' better.
Speaking of the cat's meow, my daughter-in-law has a gorgeous black and white kitty who has a broken meow. He says "Mee -- ee -- oww- ww -- ww". Takes him about 15 seconds to complete a meow, and it's all broken up, like a cell phone cutting out. Hilarious.
Asa, I can just see your little long-doggie in his stand-off with the dandelion. What a funny picture. I had a little male Yorkie for many years, and he would take five minutes out in the yard, hunting for a dandelion or other weed to lift his leg over. Never mind that we had trees. Guess they were too intimidating for him.
Yes, what about pinkcloud? She popped in once a while ago, but hasn't been back since. Oh, welcome to you, Firespray! Glad to have you, and am curious about your name. What's the origin, if you don't mind my asking?
homemaker, our pastor preached a sermon called "Sunday is Coming", that must have been similar to the one you referred to. Friday is sad, a time for tears, but Sunday is coming! Imagine that prefaced by a full choir singing "Joy Comes in the Morning", and it was powerful. You know the song I mean - "Hold on, my child, joy comes in the morning." One of my favorites. Ranks up there very close to "I Am!".
Well, gotta go change eggs in the dye cups, or I'll be at this all night! Have a blessed Easter morning, friends.--Romeena


Well, Happy Easter, everyone.
March 30, 2002 - Msg 5976: Happy Easter to the Porch! FRANKIE FLINT
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5977: Romeena....the name is of Sci-Fi origins with a long story, but I enjoy Andy Griffith. Up late throwin' expired eggs (he-he). -Firespray
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5978: HAPPY EASTER TO ALL. HE IS RISEN, HE IS RISEN.
Hope everyone here on the porch the best the Lord has to offer them.
To all who are ailing or who are in pain otherwise, may the Lord smile upon you this day.
Love your stories Romeena. Stay away from them tornado's down there. I heard it was active yesterday in Texas. I would'nt fly no kites if I was you.
Well, off to preachin for me. Ya'll make my day you know.

Love Asa
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5979: HAPPY EASTER porch, It is a rainy easter on my porch today. There goes the cook out I had planned. I am doing much better this morning. Thank you all for asking about me. The swelling has almost completely gone down. What hasn't gone down I can hide with that female war paint! hee hee. I just love all those stories about these furkids. My cat, whose name is Cracker Jack, knew something was wrong with me yesterday when I didn't move off the couch. So he hops up on me and curled up right on my chest and nuzzled his head into my shoulder. I guess he knew I needed some TLC too. Well I am off to preaching. You all have a wonderful day and remember the real reason we celebrate this day. --Salty Dog
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5980: Up from the grave he arose! He arose a victor from the dark domain and he lives forever with his saints to reign! Hallelujah! Christ arose!
Happy Easter everyone!
Charlotte Tucker
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5981: "HE IZ RIZ!" Happy Easter all, ~ Mrs. Wiley (feelin much better thank you all!)

"Christ the Lord is risen today...Ah ah ah ah ah-lelu-u-ya!"

March 31, 2002 - Msg 5982: Hi Porch, Happy Easter.....lost my ah~lelu~u~ya;o(
On the porch feeling sorry for myself, just me, the yellar dawg and a bag of peppermint patties.
Mrs. Wiley, glad you are better and hope you got a chocolate easter bunny.....I didn't;o(
Happy and bunnyless
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5983: Happy Blessed Easter all
Christ has Risen, Pray you all have had a good day in the Lord and all is well.
Ms. Wezee
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5984: Forgot..oops....Thanks Happy, no my husband dose not have a support group he is just doing it on his own and is toing preety good and I am so proud of him . Congrads to you also. Hey to the entire porsh. This sure has been a busy week. Here in southern Illinois it has been a Beautiful sun shiny day. ... Ms Wezee
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5985: Hi Ms Weeze and Happy, nope, didn't get a chocolate bunny. Got myself some Dove eggs, though - dark chocolatie goodness! Have some 00000000000 !!
~ Mrs. Wiley
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5986: Happy Easter Porch!! Hope everyone had a fine one. It's raining here on my porch, & I had to make the drive back to Roanoke this morning to drop my son back off, we had a good week!
*Mavis
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5987: Salty glad yer eye is better & Mrs. Wiley glad yer feeling better! Happy I was bunny-less this morning too, unless you count the one little bunny sitting in the yard in the rain. Miss Ellie where you been hiding? Asa you make our day too! well off to get the PA system set up, we hope to be playing next sat. night Emma get yer dancing shoes on & head to Hansonville!
*Mavis
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5988: Hey Ro have you ever put any coloring on the Plum for Easter? I used to have a Maltese & a white Poodle that I groomed, the owners wanted me to color them for every holiday! They did turn out cute!
*Mavis
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5989: Evening porch, had a good Easter. Rained all day but it was good. I didn't get a chocolate bunny either. But my secret pal at church gave me a basket with some Easter M&Ms in it. And a big bag of Life Savers jelly beans. Those things are GOOD!! Almost as good as Jelly Belly's. I got some peeps too. I love those things. Yall have a good night. Gonna be a rainy night in Carolina. That would make a good song ti+le. See ya later--Salty Dog
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5990: Hey Salty, whar in Carolina are you? I am a Wilmingtonian.
Happy
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5991: Big Lightening here in the Carolinas! Better cut your motown off or it might blow your jive!
Happy
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5992: Hey to the Porch.

--Jelsik
"You think they'll ever put a man on the moon? Boy, you already there..."
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5993: Hey Happy I am in the Western tip of NC about one hour away from Asheville If that helps you any.--SD
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5994: Hi Salty, say you are living in God's country huh!;o) Happy
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5995: Good Night Porch. God bless you & sweet dreams to all. Ms. Wezee
March 31, 2002 - Msg 5996: Yes Happy, I really am. I am about 15 minutes away from the Blue Ridge Parkway and living right in the middle of the mountains. I wouldn't trade it for nothing. Nite porch, have a good evening. Hey Rock I got the day off tomorrow. Can you handle the coffee for me? I would appreciate it greatly. Later--Salty Dog
April 01, 2002 - Msg 5997: Mornin porch. Been away for a few days. Been visiting relatives and playing a lot of golf. Have not had time to read the back post yet. Salty Dog you sleep as late as you want, coffee is made and piping hot. Pancakes are also on the griddle with losts of butter and maple syrup. For you late risers the left over pancakes will be in the warmer, right nest to the crock. Will chaeck back later, need to take my mother to the bank this morning. She likes to be there the mminute the doors open, feels like you don't have to wait as long that way. (((((((to all))))))).

The Rock

"All right boys let's do "Put Your Money In Your Shoes."" (Briscoe Darling)
April 01, 2002 - Msg 5998: Mornin' Rock! Looks like you's the first one up! My young uns got me good this mornin! They was layin' under the dining room table with new squirt guns they got in their easter baskets. Squirted me good. Luckily I was headed for the hot tub and already in my swimsuit! Then when I came to the computer there was a huge plastic fly in my chair--startled me! They got off a couple of good ones, they did! No school for them today. But lots of work for me! Got another rush job comin' today! Praise the lor d for the work! I wish I could share my chocolate bunnies with you all! My family goes overboard with the candy. Got bunnies and bags of candy from mom, aunts, uncles, and great grandma! I don't need it either! But sure is mighty tasty. A friend gave me some chocolate eggs with caramel creme in the middle. Those were my favorite! Them peeps, Salty, are a different story! I loved them things as a child and now I can't even look one in the eye! You can have my share. Salty, I posted the other day about our vacations in NC. We loved it. One vacation house was near Robbinsville, the other near Cashiers. Are they close to you? I been watchin' all the Mayberry's in color. Last night Opie was in a rock band. They're ok, but I'm about ready for some black&whites with Barney! Everybody have a wonderful Mayberry day!
Charlotte Tucker
April 01, 2002 - Msg 5999: Morning porch(yawn) Thanks Rock for the breakfast it was good. So far no one has gotten me with any practical jokes. Charlotte I am kind of in between Cashiers and Robbinsville. I am about 30 minutes from Cashiers and I am 1 hour exactly from Cherokee and I believe that is close to Robbinsville. I know that Bryson City is close to Robbinsville and we pass by it on the way to Cherokee. Well yall have a good day and dont let anybody pull anything on ya. Later--Salty Dog
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6000: testing....testing....is this mike on?.....testing

Fine Citizens of Mayberry:

First of all, my esteemed thanks to citizen Allen for allowing me freely use the words assumed, assualt, association, etc. As a great orator, my ability to use my entire vocabulary is essential to effectively rallying the citizenry in support of our fair town. ("ask not what Mayberry can do for you, but what you can do for Mayberry - loaned that one to some young upstart from Mass....what ever happen to that young man?)

Anyway, snowing like mad here in Minnesota today. My poor tulips will have to sleep a little longer. Was hoping to put the boat in by the end of the month.

Done celebrating Easter with family. Those chocolate eggs keep your mayor in that greek-god physique that you all admire.

Mayor Pike
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6001:

Hey, I got posting Number 6000! Do I win a prize or anything?

Mayor Pike
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6002:
"Pipe down Number 6000!"


April 01, 2002 - Msg 6003: Hey everybody! Just sittin' here munchin' on a blue peep and just wanted to check in. Hope everybody had a blessed Easter. I always enjoy the holiday and reflecting back on what our wonderful Saviour did for us.
Salty, you poor thing. Glad your eye is better. Watch it closely.
Mayor Pike, maybe Floyd could write a song for you or something (Oh hail to the, Oh hail to the, Oh hail to thee #6000!) Congratulations.
Glad your back Rock! You were missed.
Take care Mrs. Wiley. Hope your test come out o.k.
Ya'll watch Asa now this April 1st. He's kind of sneaky. Got to go, got a sick, but better, child. Hey to everybody. See ya'll soon.--Helen

April 01, 2002 - Msg 6004: Howdy! I'm new to "The Porch". I am currently writing a book on ethics based on TAGS. I will then teach the course locally at a university. It is NOT spiritually based but just good 'ol' right and wrong. Anyone have imput? You can reach me at: ddaycomposes@aol.com Best of luck to you and yers.

Darrell Day
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6005: How nice Darrell! I will surely email you as I admire the ethics adheered to in the fine town of Mayberry! ~ Mrs. Wiley
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6006: Hey Porch!
Just finished a long day at work. The month of March sure was a busy one & I am glad it is over.Hey to Darrell Day, just know your gona love it here, everyone is so nice. Hello Mrs. Wiley. Hey to Homemaker . Happy how is it going for you these days. My husband said to tell you congrads on non smoking.
Ms. Wezee
Best of luck to you and yers..
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6007: A prayer request. Our niece, almost 8 has neurofibromytosis, and the other week she was reading at school when she described her left eye as going black. She lost sight for a while but it came back. But her doctor said to her mother, another child patient of his had the same thing happen and 6 weeks later she went totally blind.
Carla Brooke has tumors or hematomas (I don't know which) on her brain causing severe migraines and now this short time of blindness. Please pray for her and her family. Her parents are separated and her sister needs to go to the doctor but parents seem slow on taking her.

Thanks,
Miss Ellie
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6008: Prayers for your niece Miss Ellie. Sorry to hear about her ailment. Hope and pray all is well for her and the family.

Asa
April 01, 2002 - Msg 6009: Night porch! Gots lots to say, but it is almost 1am & I gotta get in bed, just thought I would pipe in so Asa didn't go worrying none, I'll talk tomorrow!
*Mavis
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6010: Mornin porch. Coffee is on and a sausage and egg casarole is in the oven on warm, help yourselves. Salty Dog hope that eye is better. Darrell Day, welcome to the porch. If there is any way the people here can help you I sure that they will, my self included. Miss Ellie , prayers to your neice and the family. Hope the doctor was wrong. ((((((Charlotte Tucker, Helen, Mrs Wiley, Ms Wezee, Mavis and Asa)))))))). Well got to get ready to take the youngest to the orthodonist. Ya'll have a great day.

The Rock

"Hey Barney, come over to may haouse later and we'll play jacks." (Man in the truck when Barney was showing Opie haow to jump rope)
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6011: Mornin' Rock and everybody! Breakfast sounds de-licious! I got a busy one. Can't tarry on the computer. Welcome Darrell Day. Hey Darrell Day! Have a Mayberry Day!
Charlotte Tucker
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6012: I'm glad you did Mavis. How's the band coming along? I'll bet you sound real good.
I wonder what has become of some of our porch sitters, N.N., Tilley, Homemaker, Fungirl. There is more I;m missing but its early. Hope you folks are doing ok and check in mith us. Nice to hear from Miss Ellie.
Anyhow I ain't feeling so good these last couple of days, think I got some kind of stomach virus. I think I need some pills Emma.
Hope yer doing ok Mrs. Wiley. I keep a praying for you. And where has Hazel snuck off to, and Salty Dog? I got me a thought there up to no good. (hee hee hee)
Ya'll take care, and may the Lord bless you this day and always.

Asa

"BUT ANDY, I WASN'T THE 100TH ONE TO SIGN IT. I WAS THE VERY FIRST ONE."
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6013: Good Morning, porch.
- Hazel
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6014: Wow, you may not believe this, but Rock, Charlotte and Asa weren't there when I first started to post. I thought I was the first one up. Guess I stepped in a closet or something.
- Hazel

April 02, 2002 - Msg 6015: Hey Hazel, same here. I checked and Mavis was the last post and then I posted and Rock and Charlotte was there. Spooky things going on here. Hey to the Rock and Charlotte Tucker.

Asa
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6016: Good morning porch. Here I am Asa. Now what would make you think that Hazel and I would be up to no good? We was just helping Rock clean his crock. He was too busy this morning cooking and making coffee. So we helped him. Hope everyone is doing better today. Asa, you have too much sweet cider? You feel better. Prayers for all the ones that need them. See ya later. I am off to work and it is supposed to be in the high 70's today.--Salty Dog
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6017: Mornin Porch
Miss Ellie there is a wonderful prayer site at www.iccnet.org prayers go out 24 hours a day. Wonderful people there. It is for strictly prayer and the prayer woriers are right on it . Praise God. We all are praying for Carla & her Family. So Please if you have the time visit these prayer site. Everyone is welcome to put in their request. Haven't had my breakfast yet, it sure sounds like you have become qiut the cook there Rock. Save a place for me. God Bless and youall have a GREAT day . The sun is really shinning here in southern Illinois. ....Ms Wezee
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6018: Ps Miss Ellie please keep me posted on your niece.
Lots of luck to you & yers.
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6019: opps 6018 is ME ! Ms Wezee LOL
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6020: Hey to the Porch. Congrats to Maryland for winning it all
at "The Dance"...them flatlanders just couldn't keep up,
even WITH that Fife fella....

--Jelsik
"Hoosier Daddy?"
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6021: "Hoosier Daddy"? yer funny Jelsik! be back later to fill ya'll in on the goings on here on my porch, just couldn't resist commenting on Jelsik's post up there.
*Mavis
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6022: Happy 94th birthday to the great hobo, hoofer, and hillbilly, Buddy Ebsen!
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6023: Evening Porch!! Boy it has been busy here, I am worn out! I finally get the day off tomorrow, so I am requesting that Asa and Salty keep the shenanigans down to a low roar. The band is sounding great! We were supposed to go out this weekend, but got a call tonight asking us to reschedule for next weekend, I am just so excited! We are doing Dooley & boy oh boy you should hear it!! I will record it for ya'll ifin ya want. I'm gonna go hunt the ironing board. Night porch
*Mavis
that's adventure sleeping
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6024: Hey Ms Wezee, thanks for mentionin' the sight. I have to point out a funny typo in your post though. Prayer woriers kinda cracked me up. Now when we turn our burdens over to the Lord, we ain't supposed to "worie" no more. Not tryin' to be a wise guy just thought it was funny. Hey to Asa, Mavis, Jelsik, Salty Dog, Hazel, Rock, and Mrs. Wiley. Hey to Fun Girl and homemaker wherever you are!
Charlotte Tucker
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6025: Thin people ought not "worie." It's ok for fat people, but thin people ought not "worie."
CT
April 02, 2002 - Msg 6026: Hey CT.. I saw that after I already posted. LOL .. I could say I was just checking if anyone was a wake there , also when I told Rock he was a good cook I wrote your turning at to be a quit cook. It's been a long day. If you know what I mean.. Any way God bless you all. Ms Wezee
Lots of luck to you and yers.
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6027: Morning Porch, I guess yall are still asleep. So, I'll put on a pot of coffee since Rocks been so good to handle it for me. Mavis, you enjoy your day off girl. I would love to hear yall sing Dooley. I'll try to keep it down to a dull roar but you know I cant help it when I am the only one up. I just have to make some kind of noise.Well Yall have a good day. My cousin might get to come home today. The docs had first said that it would be 6 to 8 months. He was only in there 1. Aint God Good?? See yall later--Salty Dog

OLD AUNT MARIAH JUMPED IN THE FIRE
FIRE TOO HOT JUMPED IN THE POT
POT TOO BLACK JUMPED IN THE CRACK
CRACK TOO HIGH JUMPED IN THE SKY........
Sorry Mavis hee hee
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6028: Mornin porch. Thanks Salty Dog for making the coffee this morning. Just couldn't seem to get the mattress off my back today. Worked hard yesterday. After I got my son back from the orthodonist I mowed my yard and my mother's yard, collected all the garbage and went to the dump, and then did three loads of laundry. Think I'm going to take it easy today. (((((to all)))))).

The Rock

"Now you want to me sing Eating Goober Peas." (Ernset T. Bass)
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6029: Morning Porch, thats great news about your cousin Salty, Praise the Lord. God is good.
Love to hear yer recording Mavis, if you sound half as good as you look, why then you sound wonderful dear.
Still waiting to hear from N.N. and Homemaker and Fungirl and Tilley. What happened to MERLE DEAN and NEWTON MONROE and some of you others? Holler at us and let us know all is well.
Hey to Charlotte and Wezee and everyone else.

Asa
P.S. Can I be in yer band Mavis? I am real good on them cymbals. TADA DADADADADARUMPATADADA CRASH!!!
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6030: Doggone you Rock, you ain't ever there when I post the first time. Morning to you and all.

Asa
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6031: Mornin Porch. Tanks SD for the coffee, howdy Asa & Rock. glad to see y'all up already. I don't go to work till 11 today, but have a lot of bussiness to tend to befor I do. Gee whiz, always something to do but thank God I am still able to. Glad to hear ur cousin is ok Mavis. where is our prayer warrior CT... Hows that fer spillin ....LOL
It is another cold day here in Southern Illinois. Be glad when it warms up a mite, it seems I stay cold clear to my bones anymore. LOL Say have you seen the new mouse they have out, it's called a Floater, I just had to have one . Mine has Noahs Ark in it.. LOL I'm still a kid at heart. Now y'all have a Great day in the Lord & let that heaenly sonshine in ur life. Ms Wezee
Best of luck to you and yers.
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6032: I know I know I missed up againg, my friend came on line & I was trying to chat with her. you know my friend 31 she is 72 yrs. young ....Heavenly Sonshine...there CT.. LOL. I sure enjoy the porch & everyone on it . Ms Wezee
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6033: Hey Porch - praying for your Niece Miss Ellie, and for your ailin stomach Asa - hope I didn't spread no germs on the porch! Hey to "31"!

Praise reoprt: My Mom didn't have a stroke, but she does have a heart murmur. At least it's something she can live with! I thank you all for your prayers and friendship *snif*. Yes Salty, The Lord is so good!

~ Mrs. Wiley
Barney: "Faint? You feelin faint!? Well... quick... maybe we'd better loosen something! You got something I can loosen Aunt Bea?"

April 03, 2002 - Msg 6034: MERLE DEAN says "Hey"
Sorry it's been so long...No excuse...No excuse !
Just been busy...what with Easter and soccer for the boys.
"What's yer hurry ?"
I hope everyone had a nice weekend. Suppose to be beautiful here in Alabama this weekend. Can't wait !
~Mrs. Wiley, glad ta hear your Mom is okay !
SINCERELY,MERLE DEAN
"No thanks Leon !"(Barney)

April 03, 2002 - Msg 6035: Hey ya'll. Ya'll have to try this. Go to
http://home.attbi.com/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf
A ghost is hidden in the room. Get a watch to time yourself to see how long it takes. (It took me 29 secs.) If you turn up your speakers you can hear it when you get close to it with the mouse. Good luck. After you see it it's obvious!
Good news about your Mom, Mrs. Wiley. God is still in the prayer answering business!
MERLE DEAN! Long time no see. Good to hear from you! Hey to everybody! --Helen
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6036: Helen, you got me good! That's some link ~ Mrs. Wiley
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6037: Well us HOOSIERS did get to the big dance and without The General Robert Montgomery Knight. So there BOBBY, you can treat people like decent human beings and get results. Hope this message don't start a fight. Just know I wouldn't want my Little Opie or Johnny Paul or Arnold to have to play for that man.
Fun Girl
April 03, 2002 - Msg 6038: Evening Porch! Asa arentcha kind thanks for that compliment up there! We are sounding really good! We had a real good practice tonight. Helen you are just a few days late for April Fool's Day with that link there, but you know what they say? Better late than never! Night Porch, prayers for those who need them!
*Mavis
Who said that Calvin Coolidge?
No Floyd, Calvin Coolidge didn't say ever'thang